Boris Gaffe Thread

[Guest]

Gaffe #1:

The case of the London boy who was tragically stabbed to death with a piece of glass at the weekend has elicited this response from our esteemed Mayor:

"This is why we need metal detector arches".

[Lara Lara Laughs]

Mental.

[Guest]

Gaffe #2

Idea: Boris wants to have people arrested for "quality of life" crimes in order to make society more responsible

Reality: Boris cycles to County Hall, jumping three red lights and mounting the pavement.

[taipan]

Gaffe #2

Idea: Boris wants to have people arrested for "quality of life" crimes in order to make society more responsible

Reality: Boris cycles to County Hall, jumping three red lights and mounting the pavement.

But did the pavement complain?

[Merlin]

Robbie's really hurting now that Kenny's been ousted!!

How many more imaginary Boris gaffes need to come yet Rob to make up
for Ken's cheek kissing and hugging of known pro Bin Laden Muslim clerics
who openly espoused the 7/7 bombings ...
or the insulting of a jewish reporter whilst negating the after effects of the
Holocaust...
or indeed, this peach ... handing over (unaccounted) £2 Mill
of public funds to his mate to fund a so-called charity in Lewisham ... and when, abra-cadabra ...
the dosh disappeared, implementing his Mayoral powers in refusing to hold an investigation
nor having the police intervene .....

However, I do personally believe that Boris ought to be docked 3 penalty points and have his Raleigh impounded indefinitely for the heinous crime of jumping 3 traffic lights ...

[embee]

Gaffe #2

Idea: Boris wants to have people arrested for "quality of life" crimes in order to make society more responsible

Reality: Boris cycles to County Hall, jumping three red lights and mounting the pavement.

But did the pavement complain?

A spokesman for the pavement denied the allegation and confirmed they were just good friends

[lardbucket]

Gaffe #2

Idea: Boris wants to have people arrested for "quality of life" crimes in order to make society more responsible

Reality: Boris cycles to County Hall, jumping three red lights and mounting the pavement.

But did the pavement complain?

There are rumours of a suit, but nothing concrete.

[Guest]

How many more imaginary Boris gaffes

#1 and #2 were real.

I'm just waiting for the one that kicks off a riot in my city.

[Merlin]

PMSL.
2 weeks in the job and Boris is already being talked of in "riot" terms!
The Livingstonians really are missing their mentor!!

Perhaps he ought to seriously consider hiring Red Ken as his spin doctor ...
that old bugger literally got away with murder ... and got away he did!
Such were his mayoral powers!

[Chivalry Augustus]

Gaffe #1: Over a million people vote for a retard to be Mayor.

[Merlin]

They're all crawling out of the woodwork now !!!
Sore losers with short memories!

[Guest]

PMSL.
2 weeks in the job and Boris is already being talked of in "riot" terms!
!

Weeks before actually - remember the "pickanninies" comment?

[Neil D]

I had to laugh when he walked on stage to make his acceptance speech for the Mayorship... and promptly tripped over.

As a northerner, I don't really give a toss who is Mayor of London. I'm hoping Boris accidentally nukes the place so I don't have to keep going down there with work.

[G.Wood]

As a northerner, I don't really give a toss who is Mayor of London. I'm hoping Boris accidentally nukes the place so I don't have to keep going down there with work.

It would give you an excuse not to play anymore Ashes tests at Lords

[furriner]

They're all crawling out of the woodwork now !!!
Sore losers with short memories!

Pretty strong defense, mate. You're not aforementioned Boris, are you?

[Basil]

I'm so glad I don't live in London!

[Guest]

Gaffe #3

Problem: many taxi drivers are not bothering to take their bi-annual MOT test as per legislation.

Solution: Boris changes the law so that cabbies have to MOT their vehicles annually instead of bi-annually.

Outcome: Boris has made the cabs less safe.

[freddled gruntbuggly]

Can they really do enough mileage to need a roadworthy test twice a bloody year?

[taipan]

Gaffe #3

Problem: many taxi drivers are not bothering to take their bi-annual MOT test as per legislation.

Solution: Boris changes the law so that cabbies have to MOT their vehicles annually instead of bi-annually.

Outcome: Boris has made the cabs less safe.

Yep, carp like this will destroy the country

[Brass Monkey]

Typical Tories using the opinion polls to make some pissy little promises for all the 'I'm alright Jacks' out there.

[S F Barnes]

Can they really do enough mileage to need a roadworthy test twice a bloody year?

AFAIK they do about 30K miles a year. Since your average provate motor needs an MOT every 12-15K miles (on average) I'd say that cabs should be tested every 6 months or 15K miles, whichever comes sooner.

[holcs]

Typical Tories using the opinion polls to make some pissy little promises for all the 'I'm alright Jacks' out there.

C'mon Dan. I have no political allegiance, and every farking party does that!!

[freddled gruntbuggly]

Can they really do enough mileage to need a roadworthy test twice a bloody year?

AFAIK they do about 30K miles a year. Since your average provate motor needs an MOT every 12-15K miles (on average) I'd say that cabs should be tested every 6 months or 15K miles, whichever comes sooner.

I do something like 40,000k per year. A fair percentage of that on rough unsealed roads. The car gets serviced regularly, but hasn't had a roadworthy since I bought it. My mechanic and I make sure it's safe.

[Guest]

I do something like 40,000k per year. A fair percentage of that on rough unsealed roads. The car gets serviced regularly, but hasn't had a roadworthy since I bought it. My mechanic and I make sure it's safe.

Eeeh, down't 'pit. That were reeel work. Tha young 'uns divven't know tha born.

[tac]

Can they really do enough mileage to need a roadworthy test twice a bloody year?

AFAIK they do about 30K miles a year. Since your average provate motor needs an MOT every 12-15K miles (on average) I'd say that cabs should be tested every 6 months or 15K miles, whichever comes sooner.

I do something like 40,000k per year. A fair percentage of that on rough unsealed roads. The car gets serviced regularly, but hasn't had a roadworthy since I bought it. My mechanic and I make sure it's safe.

How do you get rego without a roadworthy?

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