Does everyone sneeze in threes, or is it just me?

Sneeze, sneeze, bit of a pause to build up anticipation, the big finish.

What's everyone else's sneeze routine?

Same here

You're sick!

Big Dog wrote:Same here

We should start a club. Or a support group.

WideWally wrote:You're sick!

You're out of the club.

Good.

I'll stay healthy.

You need three good blasts to clear out the sinuses.

Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

bless you, blast you, FFS stop that.

taipan wrote:Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

As a sneeze is just a nasal orgasm that would make you a sex maniac.

the old joke ...

I have a problem - every time I sneeze I have an orgasm

really, what do you take for that?


pepper

I'm a 1.5er really - so rather than atchoo. atchoo. it's atch-ATCHOO. Though I don't say atchoo. It sounds like a heavy cough. I suppose you'd call it two sneezes, on reflection.

Brass Monkey wrote:I'm a 1.5er really - so rather than atchoo. atchoo. it's atch-ATCHOO. Though I don't say atchoo. It sounds like a heavy cough. I suppose you'd call it two sneezes, on reflection.

Pansy...

It's the way Lord God made me. I'm not going to feel ashamed for sneezing less than the people in this thread - I'm a real man! With real feelings.

And girly sneezes.

taipan wrote:Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

Fark you're like the qunt next door (no, the other neighbour) who gets a head of steam up and just lets rip as loud as he can, and spraying as much mucus as he can. I feel like putting the hose on him and yelling "cover your mouth, ya rude farker".

I watched an old bitch do that in an RSL one lunch time not so long ago. I glared at her after she sneezed loudly about 8 times and barfed snot all over the pokie in front of her. She looked at me and said "I couldn't help it". I said "you could've covered your mouth, someone will be using that poker machine after you [ya rude old qunt]". She just pulled a face. I f@rted on her as I got up and left (well, I would've if I had one ready to go).

I think I'm in the three times club as well. Though my sneezes are more implosions than explosions. That amuses my friends for some reason.

I just had a 4 fer, first three were standard dry one but the fourth one was a bit wet, not very snotty but a bit saliva-ey. I dont have a tissue.
I've had better sneezes, ones where I've really thrown my body into them and projectile snotted something in front of me.

That's it for my sneeze story for today. We'll resume with more tomorrow including the time when I sneezed and coughed at the same time.

Thanks

skully wrote:

taipan wrote:Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

Fark you're like the qunt next door (no, the other neighbour) who gets a head of steam up and just lets rip as loud as he can, and spraying as much mucus as he can. I feel like putting the hose on him and yelling "cover your mouth, ya rude farker".

I watched an old bitch do that in an RSL one lunch time not so long ago. I glared at her after she sneezed loudly about 8 times and barfed snot all over the pokie in front of her. She looked at me and said "I couldn't help it". I said "you could've covered your mouth, someone will be using that poker machine after you [ya rude old qunt]". She just pulled a face. I f@rted on her as I got up and left (well, I would've if I had one ready to go).

You were playing the pokies?

taipan wrote:

skully wrote:

taipan wrote:Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

Fark you're like the qunt next door (no, the other neighbour) who gets a head of steam up and just lets rip as loud as he can, and spraying as much mucus as he can. I feel like putting the hose on him and yelling "cover your mouth, ya rude farker".

I watched an old bitch do that in an RSL one lunch time not so long ago. I glared at her after she sneezed loudly about 8 times and barfed snot all over the pokie in front of her. She looked at me and said "I couldn't help it". I said "you could've covered your mouth, someone will be using that poker machine after you [ya rude old qunt]". She just pulled a face. I f@rted on her as I got up and left (well, I would've if I had one ready to go).

You were playing the pokies?

Well you need a permit to start a fire in your backyard nowadys so it was probably easier to put the money through the machines than use it as kindling.

skully wrote:

taipan wrote:Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

Fark you're like the qunt next door (no, the other neighbour) who gets a head of steam up and just lets rip as loud as he can, and spraying as much mucus as he can. I feel like putting the hose on him and yelling "cover your mouth, ya rude farker".

I watched an old bitch do that in an RSL one lunch time not so long ago. I glared at her after she sneezed loudly about 8 times and barfed snot all over the pokie in front of her. She looked at me and said "I couldn't help it". I said "you could've covered your mouth, someone will be using that poker machine after you [ya rude old qunt]". She just pulled a face. I f@rted on her as I got up and left (well, I would've if I had one ready to go).

your poor Mum

A diet of canned dog food will do that to you...

Anyone who doesn't sneeze three times is weird.

taipan wrote:

skully wrote:

taipan wrote:Normally more than 3. 17 is my record.

Fark you're like the qunt next door (no, the other neighbour) who gets a head of steam up and just lets rip as loud as he can, and spraying as much mucus as he can. I feel like putting the hose on him and yelling "cover your mouth, ya rude farker".

I watched an old bitch do that in an RSL one lunch time not so long ago. I glared at her after she sneezed loudly about 8 times and barfed snot all over the pokie in front of her. She looked at me and said "I couldn't help it". I said "you could've covered your mouth, someone will be using that poker machine after you [ya rude old qunt]". She just pulled a face. I f@rted on her as I got up and left (well, I would've if I had one ready to go).

You were playing the pokies?

Yeah. It was pretty depressing, actually. I had lamely convinced myself that I nothing better to do than go down to the local RSL and put $20 in the pokies every day at lunch time. Our office was on the north bank of Sydney Harbour just near the Harbour Bridge, so it was a p!ss poor piece of logic. I would play for half an hour (Aussies will know the King/Queen of the Nile pokies), occasionally have a win, often simply take my $20 out after 30 minutes of back and forth, and occasionally lose the lobster.

My boss sorta got me into it, as he loved nothing more than whacking a lazy couple of $100 through the bandits each lunchtime. Fortunately I changed jobs and got out of that rut.

Not sure if the stat still holds (or indeed was ever true) but it used to be said that something like 80% of the World's pokies were in NSW.