Re: England v Australia, 3rd Test, Edgbaston, 29 July - 3 August, 2015

by Brass Monkey Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:42

lardbucket wrote:
Brass Monkey wrote:Lil' Ron is rinsing the qunt.

Runs in both innings in a bowler's match; probably man of the match.

Oh Ian Bell, you mango-balled stoat
I love you more than tac loves a goat
I want to frolic with you on a boat
We'll send Trev a sex-selfie, so we can gloat.

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:44

When did the Malteasers become Mangoes?

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:46

Clarke really has been utterly useless in this match.

It would have been handy to at least have a crack at Bairstow in this innings.

by Brass Monkey Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:47

lardbucket wrote:When did the Malteasers become Mangoes?

When Michael Clarke dropped him.

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:51

What's Bumble going on about, Pantomime Whores?

by Brass Monkey Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:54

lardbucket wrote:What's Bumble going on about, Pantomime Whores?

Brass Monkey wrote:
December 14th
Spoiler:

by Red Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:07

England moving inexorably towards a series lead.

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:08

Have to say the pitch looks very easy now; and really has done, all day.

Our first innings effort was just shit.

by OP Tipping Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:12

lardbucket wrote:Clarke dropping Bell has certainly reduced the interest in this finish.

Quite
No one likes Bell.

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:13

The ghost of Harmison there.

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:26

That could have landed anywhere.

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:38

JGK wrote:
lardbucket wrote:What is this, a woofing contest?

I'm calling it, 2 down.

Aye, while at the same time playing Bell into form.

'At least two Aussies are making sensible predictions' (copyright vilkrang, Ashes Fantasy thread)

by taipan Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:44

lardbucket wrote:Have to say the pitch looks very easy now; and really has done, all day.

Our first innings effort was just shit.

Too much Mitch and match?

by Guest Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:48

lardbucket wrote:
JGK wrote:
lardbucket wrote:What is this, a woofing contest?

I'm calling it, 2 down.

Aye, while at the same time playing Bell into form.

'At least two Aussies are making sensible predictions' (copyright vilkrang, Ashes Fantasy thread)

Yup, for two out of three tests I've been wrong. And never been more delighted to be wrong.

by Brass Monkey Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:53

F*ck.... f*ck... I can't believe we're 2-1 up. Cannot believe it. Fair play to us. Didn't think we had it in us. Yes!

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:53

Well, there it is. It's been inevitable since the end of the second session on day 1.

Bell MOTM for mine.

by OP Tipping Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:55

Well done, especially Anderson and Finn.

It would be nice to have a close match.

by Guest Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:57

lardbucket wrote:Well, there it is. It's been inevitable since the end of the second session on day 1.

Bell MOTM for mine.

In a low scoring game he should be, but 6 fers look sexier than a couple of 50s.

Hope you're right but wouldn't be surprised if you weren't.

by taipan Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:58

Bell looks good at 3. Why haven't they tried it before.

by OP Tipping Fri 31 Jul 2015, 15:58

They are still using Benaud's voice for the " You Are watching 9's wide world of sports". Yikes.

by LeFromage Fri 31 Jul 2015, 16:03

The Testicular Titan, the Sheikh of Scrotum, the Ian of Bell. For shame that anyone doubted you, brave prince.

F*ck knows how a side as shitty as England have won two Tests in this series, but it's all a good laugh innit?

by lardbucket Fri 31 Jul 2015, 16:05

Dello wrote:The Testicular Titan, the Sheikh of Scrotum, the ~~Ian of~~ Bell of End. For shame that anyone doubted you, brave prince.

F*ck knows how a side as shitty as England have won two Tests in this series, but it's all a good laugh innit?

fixed

the Nawab of Knob, the Thane of Throssell, the Maharajah of Meat, the Guru of Gonad.

by LeFromage Fri 31 Jul 2015, 16:07

taipan wrote:Bell looks good at 3. Why haven't they tried it before.

He didn't like it. It was scary. Like when he tried asparagus for the first time. There were tears.

But now the England management have told him to eat his vegetables or there'll be no Playstation for a week, it turns out he doesn't mind them at all.

by Guest Fri 31 Jul 2015, 16:14

Athers needs to check his maths, pretty sure a draw at Trent Bridge won't mean Australia retain the Ashes...

by Brass Monkey Fri 31 Jul 2015, 16:18

Dello wrote:
taipan wrote:Bell looks good at 3. Why haven't they tried it before.

He didn't like it. It was scary. Like when he tried asparagus for the first time. There were tears.

But now the England management have told him to eat his vegetables or there'll be no Playstation for a week, it turns out he doesn't mind them at all.

They agreed to get a SWAT team to snipe Trev, who'd mysteriously appeared outside Ian Bell's house, amongst the bins, after the first innings. He was on it like a tramp on chips. It's a big relief for him... I think Trev was half the reason Bell was doddering around like a shell-shocked WW1 veteran for most of his career. Single White Male.

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