Symonds to renew hostilities with 'humourless' Saffas

The bit about the nightclub stoush with Smith is meant to be apochrypal.


Andrew Symonds renews hostilities with South AfricaBy Ben Dorries

December 08, 2008 12:00am

IF Andrew Symonds thought Brisbane pub-goers were unfriendly, wait until the allrounder re-acquaints with the South Africa cricket team.

Approaching the one-year anniversary of his dramatic run-in with India's Harbhajan Singh, Symonds is preparing for another feisty Test summer against the South Africans, with whom he also shares a prickly relationship.

There is no love lost between the combative Australian allrounder and the team he has labelled "humourless". Several of the Proteas top players have vivid memories of clashing with Symonds during Australia's 2006 tour of South Africa and some privately admit they cannot stand the controversial allrounder.

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One of South Africa's favourite moments of the series came in the seaside city of Durban when Symonds was struck a vicious blow near the mouth by a Makhaya Ntini bouncer.

A bloodied and battered Symonds batted on but only after fiery South African quick Andre Nel sledged him about being scared.

Also in that series, wicketkeeper Mark Boucher was referring to Symonds when he insisted the South Africans had lost respect for some Australian players.

Symonds, who has been in a deep form trough, knows he will cop more of the same in this summer's three-Test series starting in Perth on December 17. "For whatever reason, the South Africans took a dislike to me," Symonds writes in his book, Roy: Going for Broke.

"Although I found them a bit humourless on occasion, I could understand why they sometimes react the way they do."

The Proteas arrived in Western Australia yesterday, and will begin training today.

Skipper Ricky Ponting insists Symonds is a certain inclusion for the first Test with selectors set to meet tomorrow to choose Aust- ralia's squad.

Fellow allrounder Shane Watson will also be named in Australia's squad and his chances of playing have risen with offspinner Jason Krejza still struggling with injury.

It could be a make-or-break series for Symonds, who has rarely been at his best against South Africa - scoring 223 runs in six Tests at the modest average of 24.78.

South African star Jacques Kallis stoked the fires of the fierce rivalry by claiming his side had been watching Symonds' many controversies with interest in the last 12 months.

Kallis, who comes to Australia with a billing as the world's best Test allrounder, is clearly looking forward to locking horns with his Australian allrounder rival.

Kallis, 33, has been down on batting form in 2008 with 519 Test runs at 28.83 - but he has enjoyed a bumper bowling year with 23 Test wickets at 27.04.

"Symonds is an interesting sort of character on and off the field. I see he got himself into a bit of trouble," Kallis told The Daily Telegraph. "It appears he has been out of line and he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy and I suppose every team needs someone like that."

The terse relationship between Symonds and South African skipper Graeme Smith could also provide another fascinating subplot to this summer's Test battle.

In 2006, Symonds was asked to leave a Cape Town nightclub after an apparent row involving Smith and a group of South African rugby players.

Yeah, like Symonds is one of the happiest people around in the game.

A thread started by red with humourless as the title.

Oh, the irony.

Red wrote:The bit about the nightclub stoush with Smith is meant to be apochrypal.


Andrew Symonds renews hostilities with South AfricaBy Ben Dorries

December 08, 2008 12:00am
.............."Symonds is an interesting sort of character on and off the field. I see he got himself into a bit of trouble," Kallis told The Daily Telegraph. "It appears he has been out of line and he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy and I suppose every team needs someone like that."

...........

Here we go..

according to a press piece here, Kallis is not one of the smartest humans on the planet....apparently while running along the beach one day with a friend, he asked how high they were above sea level

He was probably hoping to use Nigel's excuse for having a small dick . . .

I could say NSR but you wouldn't get it.

horace wrote:according to a press piece here, Kallis is not one of the smartest humans on the planet....apparently while running along the beach one day with a friend, he asked how high they were above sea level

But does Kallis know when the 21st century started?

horace wrote:according to a press piece here, Kallis is not one of the smartest humans on the planet....apparently while running along the beach one day with a friend, he asked how high they were above sea level

The origin of this, per the vice president of CSA at the time, was that Kallis asked the question when landing on one of the WI islands.

Another Kallis story is that as a wide eyed rookie on his first tour, he eagerly looked out of the plane window, hoping to see the equator.

"Symonds is an interesting sort of character on and off the field. I see he got himself into a bit of trouble," Kallis told The Daily Telegraph. "It appears he has been out of line and he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy and I suppose every team needs someone like that."

ALL TEAMS NEED QUOTAS: KALLIS

"Symonds is an interesting sort of character on and off the field. I see he got himself into a bit of trouble," Kallis told The Daily Telegraph. "It appears he has been out of line and he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy and I suppose every team needs someone like that."

BLACKS NEED BRINGING INTO LINE: KALLIS

"Symonds is an interesting sort of character on and off the field. I see he got himself into a bit of trouble," Kallis told The Daily Telegraph. "It appears he has been out of line and he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy and I suppose every team needs someone like that."

-SYMONDS IS A C*NT: KALLIS.

"For whatever reason, the South Africans took a dislike to me," -Symonds

"he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy"-Kallis

KALLIS RESPONDS TO ACCUSATIONS THAT SOUTH AFRICA'S PLAYERS DON'T LIKE SYMONDS.

No silver medal awarded in this event.....

Henry wrote:Another Kallis story is that as a wide eyed rookie on his first tour, he eagerly looked out of the plane window, hoping to see the equator.

That was one I heard about Kallis, and always thought the sea level boner was attributed to Herschy "the housebrick" Gibbs.

Henry wrote:

"Symonds is an interesting sort of character on and off the field. I see he got himself into a bit of trouble," Kallis told The Daily Telegraph. "It appears he has been out of line and he's been brought back into line. He's a colourful sort of guy and I suppose every team needs someone like that."

-SYMONDS IS A C*NT: KALLIS.

I recall Woody doing this to a guy at work. He had the letters GET FARKED distributed in bold down the page of text. To this day, the guy can't work out why certain letters were in bold and most of the rest weren't.