Terribly Embarrassing Travel Tales Thread

[mynah]

With the holiday season round the corner and some of us planning holidays in distant countries, this is a cautionary thread about the pitfalls of travel…

Two sisters who were colleagues of mine at another publication went to Greece one year. As they lay soaking up the sun on a topless beach, it gradually drifted into the one’s consciousness that the previous evening’s kleftiko had, perhaps, not been as kosher as she’d thought. Within minutes, she was pretty sure of it.

Disconcertingly, the cloakroom she’d banked on turned out not to have a toilet. Even more disconcertingly, having left the tourist-crammed topless beach she now found herself desperately miming her needs to the conservatively clad locals in the street, whose lack of English wasn’t improved by the distracting sight of her ample assets swinging with every gesture.

At last she elicited from one that the nearest toilet was some distance away, inside a very posh restaurant. She set off at record speed without daring to breathe, ran up the steps, flung open the door – and discovered at that instant that she should, indeed, have begun her journey earlier. Suffice to say that anyone who wondered where she went next need only have followed the yellow tracks to the ladies.

There is a part I’m still wondering about, though: I never heard how she got out of the restaurant again. I take it she didn't just wipe her arse and saunter out. How long do you wait until everyone had forgotten the sight of an almost stark naked woman appearing at the door and bursting in and out at the same time?

[tac]

I'm surprised kleftikos would have that effect . . . sure it wasn't the anal sex?

[Guest]

I ate 8 kiwi fruits last night, and I feel a bit like that this morning

[taipan]

I'm surprised kleftikos would have that effect . . . sure it wasn't the anal sex?

Ah, the greek way

[tac]

Did you know that the word "enema" comes from the Greek "enemalousin" meaning "who's a big boy"?

[tac]

I once ate some bad dog in Seoul and spent a week in my hotel room as crook as a . . . um, dog . . .

[Guest]

Gosh, the things you learn on this forum..........

[mynah]

I'm surprised kleftikos would have that effect . . . sure it wasn't the anal sex?

Anyone who told this story with relish wouldn't be lying about what they had the previous evening...

At least you have no excuse for crapping yourself in Australia, unless you happen not to have an internet connection while driving.

Official toilet website of the Australian Government

[tac]

Gosh, the things you learn on this forum..........

Eh? You've learnt something on this forum . . . ?

[tac]

I'm surprised kleftikos would have that effect . . . sure it wasn't the anal sex?

Anyone who told this story with relish wouldn't be lying about what they had the previous evening...

At least you have no excuse for crapping yourself in Australia, unless you happen not to have an internet connection while driving.

Official toilet website of the Australian Government

But they might lie about the anal sex . . . .

[taipan]

I'm surprised kleftikos would have that effect . . . sure it wasn't the anal sex?

Anyone who told this story with relish wouldn't be lying about what they had the previous evening...

maybe the relish was the problem.

[Anniyan]

internet connection while driving.

Official toilet website of the Australian Government[/quote]

George Michael may find that very useful!

[tac]

internet connection while driving.

Official toilet website of the Australian Government

George Michael may find that very useful![/quote]

Trev does . . .

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