Return of the Jedi (KP)

No thread about this? How comes blads?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cricket/19783259

He should hold out a bit longer - if England continue to bat as spastically as they have since dropping Pietersen, there's a chance they might end up having to apologise to him.

Don't see how they can add him to the squad to tour India, though. They'd have about nine batsmen.

Can't imagine there'll be too much dressing room love for him.

skully wrote:Can't imagine there'll be too much dressing room love for him.

He's got more than enough love for himself to fill the void.

The England dressing room is full of wankers anyway. It'd be a badge of honour to not be considered one of the in-crowd.

Dello wrote:

skully wrote:Can't imagine there'll be too much dressing room love for him.

He's got more than enough love for himself to fill the void.

The England dressing room is full of wankers anyway. It'd be a badge of honour to not be considered one of the in-crowd.

KP ---> England Dressing room
Zat ----> Flaming Bails

Will be interesting to see the dressingroom dynamics.

KP may not be the panacea the pommy fans are expecting though.

In the afterglow of his occasional stellar innings they seem to forget that he's been largely a sporadic performer in recent times.

In reality they have won a couple of Ashes series with minimal contribution from him (or you could argue others have been more influential), they've never beaten SA in a series with him playing and still have been flaky in Asia.

G.Wood wrote:

Dello wrote:

skully wrote:Can't imagine there'll be too much dressing room love for him.

He's got more than enough love for himself to fill the void.

The England dressing room is full of wankers anyway. It'd be a badge of honour to not be considered one of the in-crowd.

KP ---> England Dressing room
Zat ----> Flaming Bails

[snorfle]

[My Mum] "It's rude to speak ill of the dead" [/My Mum]

Dello wrote:He should hold out a bit longer - if England continue to bat as spastically as they have since dropping Pietersen, there's a chance they might end up having to apologise to him.

Don't see how they can add him to the squad to tour India, though. They'd have about nine batsmen.

Really? Care to name them?

Chewbacca and R2D2?

Dello wrote:Don't see how they can add him to the squad to tour India, though. They'd have about nine batsmen.

they might need them

would be nice if he comes to india as well. always better to face a full strength team. we need to find out where we really stand after those disastrous 6 months

I don't want him back - have you seen how we've been doing without him? I think you'll find Gatey, Blocker, Lead-foot, Swisher, Snicker, Eunuch and Inepto The Wondersloth have been doing just fine without him.

To be fair, inepto the wondersloth was just finding his feet and was showing signs that he was upto international standards after a 60 odd.

taipan wrote:

Dello wrote:He should hold out a bit longer - if England continue to bat as spastically as they have since dropping Pietersen, there's a chance they might end up having to apologise to him.

Don't see how they can add him to the squad to tour India, though. They'd have about nine batsmen.

Really? Care to name them?

Cook
Root
Compton
Trott
Bell
Morgan
Bairstow
Patel

Pietsersen

Red wrote:Will be interesting to see the dressingroom dynamics.

KP may not be the panacea the pommy fans are expecting though.

In the afterglow of his occasional stellar innings they seem to forget that he's been largely a sporadic performer in recent times.

In reality they have won a couple of Ashes series with minimal contribution from him (or you could argue others have been more influential), they've never beaten SA in a series with him playing and still have been flaky in Asia.

We would still be going home if he was in the team.

One player does not make that much difference, especially if at least half the rest are completely useless. He is not the panacea that we (supposedly) hope he is.

But, from reading comments around various places, he is seen as some sort of deity who would have won us this competition single-handedly. You must be wrong, Red, as I think you'll find Pietersen won us all the Ashes ever played, has never scored less than 100 in an innings, and strikes at 400. Also, his record in Asia is better than God himself and he can outbat Tendulkar with a broken twig and no hands.

Klämmssøn wrote:
We would still be going home if he was in the team.

One player does not make that much difference, especially if at least half the rest are completely useless. He is not the panacea that we (supposedly) hope he is.

Interesting point. I'd probably not disagree, but I'd add that the most costly of all our problems were the poor starts up top. He's the T20 business, no shadow of a doubt. World #1, in fact. Who knows really what would've happened with him in the side - our severe inadequacies may well have been hidden by a couple of decent knocks.

Dello wrote:

taipan wrote:

Dello wrote:He should hold out a bit longer - if England continue to bat as spastically as they have since dropping Pietersen, there's a chance they might end up having to apologise to him.

Don't see how they can add him to the squad to tour India, though. They'd have about nine batsmen.

Really? Care to name them?

Cook
Root
Compton
Trott
Bell
Morgan
Bairstow
Patel

Pietsersen

Maybe 2 then

Brass Monkey wrote:

Klämmssøn wrote:
We would still be going home if he was in the team.

One player does not make that much difference, especially if at least half the rest are completely useless. He is not the panacea that we (supposedly) hope he is.

Interesting point. I'd probably not disagree, but I'd add that the most costly of all our problems were the poor starts up top. He's the T20 business, no shadow of a doubt. World #1, in fact. Who knows really what would've happened with him in the side - our severe inadequacies may well have been hidden by a couple of decent knocks.

Totally plausible. qv Australia, Shane Watson.

You make Watson sound better than a bacon and KFC gravy sandwich

Doubtful. Probably not much around better than that sandwich. Unless the bread part was actually made of bacon as well.

No one has come off well out of this- Pietersen, the ECB, the Swann/Anderson clique.....

Let's just admit they're all c*nts and get on with it.

ECB and Kevin Pietersen confirm that agreement has been reached concerning a process for his re-integration into the England team during the remainder of 2012. Upon completion of the programme, the England Selectors will consider Kevin for future matches.

Kevin Pietersen has apologised to Andrew Strauss and wishes to express to all those who support England his regrets at the impact the recent controversies have had on the England Team. He now wishes to put the events of the summer behind him and to focus on regaining his place in the England Team.

"With regards the issue of the BBM messages, due to the fact that Kevin had not retained the BBM messages, this matter has been successfully concluded through a binding assurance provided to ECB by Kevin. Kevin conceded that the messages exchanged were provocative. ECB is satisfied, following receipt of this binding assurance, that to the best of his recollection, Kevin did not convey any messages which were derogatory about the England Captain, the England Team Director, the ECB or employees of the ECB. Furthermore, there was no tactical information whatsoever provided to members of the South African Touring Party."

Couldn't be more vague if they tried

Legal proceedings probably muddied the waters and forced the ECB's hand. I assume the saffie players must have deleted the messages too.

Henry wrote:ECB and Kevin Pietersen confirm that agreement has been reached concerning a process for his re-integration into the England team during the remainder of 2012. Upon completion of the programme, the England Selectors will consider Kevin for future matches.

Kevin Pietersen has apologised to Andrew Strauss and wishes to express to all those who support England his regrets at the impact the recent controversies have had on the England Team. He now wishes to put the events of the summer behind him and to focus on regaining his place in the England Team.

"With regards the issue of the BBM messages, due to the fact that Kevin had not retained the BBM messages, this matter has been successfully concluded through a binding assurance provided to ECB by Kevin. Kevin conceded that the messages exchanged were provocative. ECB is satisfied, following receipt of this binding assurance, that to the best of his recollection, Kevin did not convey any messages which were derogatory about the England Captain, the England Team Director, the ECB or employees of the ECB. Furthermore, there was no tactical information whatsoever provided to members of the South African Touring Party."

Couldn't be more vague if they tried

So WTF were they derogatory about?

If KP had stayed completely silent and not even hinted that the messages were provocative or derogatory, the ECB wouldn't have had a leg to stand on.

Having said that, England will have a huge ego with all the baggage that comes with it in the dressing room again, and some of the England players now really hate him, not just dislike him.

Should be interesting if KP misfields off Swann's bowling.

Now, as all on here know, I was scathing of KP when he started mouthing off a few months ago, but this is simply ridiculous from the ECB-

He is being "re-integrated" into the England team. Yep, those are the words. As if he's a prisoner who has just been paroled, rather than a sportsman with a big ego who sent a few naughty texts and doesn't get on well with his teammates

What a farce.