RD's dream date

THE attempted armed robbery of a Russian hairdresser became a three-day sex ordeal for the would-be thief, leaving him with torn genitals and a Viagra hangover.

IT website The Register reports the man, known as Viktor, tried to rob the hairdresser in the town of Meshchovsk.

The owner, 28-year-old Olga, agreed to hand over the takings but as she was giving him the money, used her karate skills to knock him to the ground and tie him up with a hairdryer cord.

She then locked him in the storeroom and told colleagues she’d call the police.

However, she instead stripped him and cuffed him to a heater with a pair of fluffy pink handcuffs. She then fed him Viagra and raped him several times over the next four days.

When finally released, Viktor went first to hospital for treatment for his torn frenulum, and then reported Olga to the police. When she was arrested, Olga reported him for robbery.

“What a b**tard,” shecomplained.

“Yes, we had sex a couple of times. But I’ve bought him new jeans, gave him food and even gave him 1000 roubles when he left.”

Viktor admitted she had fed him well.

I'm sure I've seen a movie with a similar plot

Most unattractive man, that Viktor!

jeez, and only yesterday I suggested an alternate date for RD, to Skully.

If she subdued him, she may not have been an oil painting herself. I keep having nightmares about a very dark bar, some drinks that should've been oulawed by chemical weapons treaties and a girl with a dusky voice and a shape that could only be described as Rubenesque by the kindest observer.

Bradman wrote:If she subdued him, she may not have been an oil painting herself.

Has there ever been someone called Olga who is an oil painting?

Good point. Unless you're into tractor mechanics an Olga is definately a no go zone.

Bradman wrote:If she subdued him, she may not have been an oil painting herself. I keep having nightmares about a very dark bar, some drinks that should've been oulawed by chemical weapons treaties and a girl with a dusky voice and a shape that could only be described as Rubenesque by the kindest observer.

Kindly refrain from sharing your 'darkest thoughts'.

I had a similar experience once. It's called married life.

I was lucky enough to sober up by the time we got to the hotel room, and them proceeded to pour as much cheap booze and valium down my throat and hers as I could without legal ramifications.

This was in Vegas?

G.Wood wrote:

Bradman wrote:If she subdued him, she may not have been an oil painting herself.

Has there ever been someone called Olga who is an oil painting?

Olga Kurylenko - a Bond girl...

Waiting for AD to mention Olga Korbut....

skully wrote:

G.Wood wrote:

Bradman wrote:If she subdued him, she may not have been an oil painting herself.

Has there ever been someone called Olga who is an oil painting?

Olga Kurylenko - a Bond girl...

But can she handle a spanner?

But can she handle a spanner?

I'm happy to volunteer to find out.

JGK wrote:

But can she handle a spanner?

I'm happy to volunteer to find out.

You missed the easy setup

Actually I must have been really drunk. I think that's her.

You did well...

taipan wrote:

JGK wrote:

But can she handle a spanner?

I'm happy to volunteer to find out.

You missed the easy setup

Did you want me to mention my adjustable wrench?

JGK wrote:

taipan wrote:

JGK wrote:

But can she handle a spanner?

I'm happy to volunteer to find out.

You missed the easy setup

Did you want me to mention my adjustable wrench?

No, just that she could tighten your nuts

skully wrote:You did well...

Skulls, either Dello must make her the official FB girl, or you must change your avatar.

Meh - her face ain't that great.

*Ignores obvious reply*

Speaking of avatars. She's making Megan look like a dog.

Stick to your tractor mechanics

Not that I'd kick Megan out of bed. Well not once.