New Zealand v England, 2nd Test, Christchurch, 30 March - 3 April, 2018

Lindsay no.2 wrote:Getting out to De Grandhomme must feel properly shit.

From BBC, '...an awkward blow from a Colin de Grandhomme short ball knocked his helmet off'.

I think that might feel even shittier.

Lindsay no.2 wrote:Can you captain from a cell?

Not at the moment but I trust the ECB to find a way.

Lindsay no.2 wrote:

Lindsay no.2 wrote:Getting out to De Grandhomme must feel properly shit.

From BBC, '...an awkward blow from a Colin de Grandhomme short ball knocked his helmet off'.

I think that might feel even shittier.

Just seen this on the highlights. Very strange, seemed like Bairstow totally lost track of the ball. Before that he'd been happily slapping Wagner's far more testing short balls to the boundary.

MoH wrote:

Lindsay no.2 wrote:

Lindsay no.2 wrote:Getting out to De Grandhomme must feel properly shit.

From BBC, '...an awkward blow from a Colin de Grandhomme short ball knocked his helmet off'.

I think that might feel even shittier.

Just seen this on the highlights. Very strange, seemed like Bairstow totally lost track of the ball. Before that he'd been happily slapping Wagner's far more testing short balls to the boundary.

I know it's pathetic - but can I say that makes me titter.

vilkrang wrote:
Amazing that we want to drop someone who has scored two double hundreds within the last year.

One in a dead rubber on a track so flat that even Stuart Broad got a fifty. The other against the mighty West Indies.

He's not scored a meaningful run in a long time.

Frankly, if England are being honest with themselves, they need two new openers, two new middle order batsmen, a spinner and at least two new fast bowlers.

Root, Stokes and Bairstow are the only "bankers" for the future - and even then, one of them might be off to prison.

Surely whatever happens, he’s not going to get more than a few months? He’s not up for murder or anything like that... probably community service/suspended sentence if he is found guilty. Could be a problem with visas for some countries I guess, but beyond that it doesn’t seem like a long term issue for England.

Good fightback by Bairstow & Wood.
WTF is Jack Leach?

A proper spinner from Somerset - on the fringes of the Test team for a year or two, held back (some say on very thin evidence) by an allegation his action may be suspect.

Don't know how his bowling will go. But already, his batting (technique, character & nous) has put at least half the players further up the order to shame.

Lindsay no.2 wrote:

MoH wrote:

Lindsay no.2 wrote:

Lindsay no.2 wrote:Getting out to De Grandhomme must feel properly shit.

From BBC, '...an awkward blow from a Colin de Grandhomme short ball knocked his helmet off'.

I think that might feel even shittier.

Just seen this on the highlights. Very strange, seemed like Bairstow totally lost track of the ball. Before that he'd been happily slapping Wagner's far more testing short balls to the boundary.

I know it's pathetic - but can I say that makes me titter.

But does Wagner stop wagging when he has his balls happily slapped around? Or does it just get him more worked up?

beamer wrote:Surely whatever happens, he’s not going to get more than a few months? He’s not up for murder or anything like that... probably community service/suspended sentence if he is found guilty. Could be a problem with visas for some countries I guess, but beyond that it doesn’t seem like a long term issue for England.

Can get up to three years if convicted of affray. Doesn't help his case that there's video evidence of him beating the snot out of the victim, I wouldn't have thought.

Jack "Sucka" Leach is a perfectly well organised batsman for a rabbit.

Broad should be down at 10 for the second innings.

Played, Jonny. You headbanging dipstick.

Dello wrote:

beamer wrote:Surely whatever happens, he’s not going to get more than a few months? He’s not up for murder or anything like that... probably community service/suspended sentence if he is found guilty. Could be a problem with visas for some countries I guess, but beyond that it doesn’t seem like a long term issue for England.

Can get up to three years if convicted of affray. Doesn't help his case that there's video evidence of him beating the snot out of the victim, I wouldn't have thought.

Even that only means he would actually serve 18 months. Would be back in time for W20202020. And how often is the maximum sentence imposed for anything?

beamer wrote:

Dello wrote:

beamer wrote:Surely whatever happens, he’s not going to get more than a few months? He’s not up for murder or anything like that... probably community service/suspended sentence if he is found guilty. Could be a problem with visas for some countries I guess, but beyond that it doesn’t seem like a long term issue for England.

Can get up to three years if convicted of affray. Doesn't help his case that there's video evidence of him beating the snot out of the victim, I wouldn't have thought.

Even that only means he would actually serve 18 months. Would be back in time for W20202020. And how often is the maximum sentence imposed for anything?

I wouldn't have believed a judge in Britain would jail someone for teaching their dog to do a Nazi salute as a joke until last week, so it'd take a brave man to guess what Stokes' punishment will be. Could be a fine and community service, could be the full whack sentence to make an example of him.

307 a/o. Way under par, I think. Pitch looks flat as flat - second new ball did nowt for NZ.

Reckon they'll fancy 500+.

Dello wrote:

beamer wrote:

Dello wrote:

beamer wrote:Surely whatever happens, he’s not going to get more than a few months? He’s not up for murder or anything like that... probably community service/suspended sentence if he is found guilty. Could be a problem with visas for some countries I guess, but beyond that it doesn’t seem like a long term issue for England.

Can get up to three years if convicted of affray. Doesn't help his case that there's video evidence of him beating the snot out of the victim, I wouldn't have thought.

Even that only means he would actually serve 18 months. Would be back in time for W20202020. And how often is the maximum sentence imposed for anything?

I wouldn't have believed a judge in Britain would jail someone for teaching their dog to do a Nazi salute as a joke until last week, so it'd take a brave man to guess what Stokes' punishment will be. Could be a fine and community service, could be the full whack sentence to make an example of him.

It’s not career-threatening though, in any case, unless it just sends him right off the rails.

Dello wrote:307 a/o. Way under par, I think. Pitch looks flat as flat - second new ball did nowt for NZ.

Reckon they'll fancy 500+.

I'm not quite as pessimistic as that but I think a lead of 100 for NZ is on the cards. Really not convinced about Mark Wood as a Test bowler, I reckon he'll go round the park. Doesn't seem to have a stock ball. And he's probably already carrying an injury after his batting exploits.

Good start, though. They're actually pitching the ball up for a change. Latham no more.

Hmmm, I'm not watching but if the cricinfo commentary is to be believed Anderson is boomeranging it about.

Un-Raval-d. Jimmy finally finds his edge after beating it about ten times.

Erasmus and Oxenford doing their best to not give stone-dead lbws out. And for once a Broad review isn't a total bellend job.

Sheep 4-32, this could yet be a surprise win for the Evil Empire.

Watling and Mr Big have made a fair recovery. Still not on par.

groan... you'd think the Pomgolians would have the decency to chew their lollies in the dressing room.

Have played cricket for nearly 50 years ... never once felt the need to have mints lollies or gum on the field. Just ban it.