New Zealand v England, 1st Test, Hamilton, 5-9th March

All the people who have taken a flat pitch and poor bowling as a chance to have a go Vaughan have shown just how idiotic, c*ntfaced and they are and should be throughly ashamed of themselves. F*ck off and learn a thing or two about causailty you stupid, tw*ttish morons.

Danny, doremi and JKL are the only person who've made any sense.

That's all.

taipan wrote:Speak up

PMSL.

Now that was a good sledge.

Get ****** Laura.

This time blame the pitch ...
Next time the weather ...
Then the selection process...
Then another poor pitch ...

There will always be "positives" to take from every game FFS. (Alastair Campbell - April 2007)

Get real - watch Vawn's body language closely when in the field (rather than fantasize about his arse) and you'll see clearly that the guy is, more often than not, clueless when the wheels start to come off ... rather than set an example with a positive approach as Naz and Stewart did before him
It's all wine and roses when the team fires on all cylinders - but the true mettle of a Captain is when he can wring out
decent performances from his bowlers on a shite wicket not openly screw up his eyes and groan when Harmie gets it wrong.

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:All the people who have taken a flat pitch and poor bowling as a chance to have a go Vaughan have shown just how idiotic, c*ntfaced and they are and should be throughly ashamed of themselves. F*ck off and learn a thing or two about causailty you stupid, tw*ttish morons.

Danny, doremi and JKL are the only person who've made any sense.

That's all.

Look at me - I have an opinion. Anyone who doesn't share it is obviously an intellectual cripple.

Look at me! Look at me! LOOK AT ME!!!

Meh.

merlin - No. Just no. You're not making any sense. I shall ignore you.

Dello - I just want people to know how little sense they make, in my opinion. What's wrong with that? If they're allowed to post the same repetitive, dribbling, rhetoric about Vaughan over and over again it's only going to be so long before someone tells them to f*ck off and sort themselves out. I've tried the softly, softly approach and it doesn't work. They never listen anyway so it never does any good.

Nothing to do with being a cripple, intellectual or otherwise. It's just nonsense. I can point out nonsense if I want to. Nothing to do with people looking at me either. If I wanted people to look at me, I'd just streak through Marks and Spencers.

Who the f*ck shops at Marks and Spencers anymore?

Get with the times, man. Primark is where its at.

I don't shop at Marks and Spencers. It's far too expensive. I sometimes go in there just to look at the delights. Then I look wistfully around, assume my puppy dog face, and start droning "I'm just looooooooooooooooooking, I'm not buuuuuuuuuuuuying. Keeps me smiling" in the hope that some old lady will pity me and buy me something from the delicious sandwiches section.

It often works. I tell you, forget the Big Issue, the homeless need to get clued up on rubbish Stereophonics songs. It's the way forward.

They sell food at Primark now? You're blowing my mind.

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:merlin - No. Just no. You're not making any sense. I shall ignore you.

Of course I'm not ... certainly not to you anyway.
It's beyond your paucity of cricketing knowledge and intellect.
Open both your eyes and your mind ... watch and learn.

PS - before you scream "Shah" ... let's be clear - we're talking about credible captaincy here ... (or not, as in Vawn's case).

Oh, so now it's Vaughan's captaincy, not his selections. You change your position so often that it is impossible to have any sort of meanignful debate with you. Your posts about fielding position were utter shite. Thee example of Sidebottom was utter shite. The reason Vaughan plays an offside field to Sidebottom is because he's reliable and can generally bowl a decent line. Besides, what's he supposed to do, never play attacking fields because all of his bowlers are shite? HTF would he ever get a wicket. The "needs to make his shit bowlers bowl well" comment is utter shite as well.

You'd be a joke of a captain. I'd love to see you forcing shit bowlers to bowl well. What would you do? Threaten a beating behind the sheds unless they bowled a certain line? Or would you get them to bowl well with mind power alone?

Get a clue.

Oh ***** off Lara ....


The debate is about Vaughan.
period.
Captain, selector, power mad guru, confidante, whatever.

Yes Sibo is a decent bowler - but FFS, when the plan fails, as it abjectly did, he continued with it - bullying the 23 year old into playing to Vawn's plan !!! Taylor naturally had different ideas!!
FFS - you do that to a struggling newbie - not an established confidant young tyke on 96.

One question Lara - Have you ever played this game at a competant level? Judging from your remaks - clearly not.
Sure, you can question my ability as a captain - but let's just say, at senior league level, my stints as captain of my club show a clear win percentage!
Next time you bump into Jimmy Adams, ask him the question!!

Basically, an arm around your wayward quick, a quiet encouraging chat with him between overs: a re-set field to protect him from possible slaughter and finally, NOT screwing your eyes and gazing heavenward at a loose ball ... all these things help towards building confidence - yes, even on a shit track, and yes, even with a pussy like Harmison.

Get a clue??
I'd suggest you try playing the game rather than armchairing it.

Merlin wrote:...
Next time you bump into Jimmy Adams, ask him the question!!

Basically, an arm around your wayward quick, a quiet encouraging chat with him between overs: a re-set field to protect him from possible slaughter and finally, NOT screwing your eyes and gazing heavenward at a loose ball ... all these things help towards building confidence - yes, even on a shit track, and yes, even with a pussy like Harmison.

Get a clue??
I'd suggest you try playing the game rather than armchairing it.

Fark me Merlo, you've captained a team that had Jimmy Adams and/or cappoed against him?

I've played the game enough. I used to play a bit for my Uni team. Besides, it is is irrelevant - don't use the old "I've played some cricket so I can talk utter shit" line.

FFS. It didn't abjectly fail. Sidebottom was our best bowler and bowled some quality, accurate, spells. Just because he went for the odd four when he strayed off his line, that means that Vaughan's a crap captain. Get a clue.

If your winning percentage is half decent, I doubt it's got much to do with you. You've probably got a half decent side.

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAH! That's ridiculous. Vaughan needs to put his arm around Harmison and it will magically cure the problems Harmison has had with his action over the years. Brilliant merlin. You're a genius. Or perhaps he should put his arm around Monty and suddenly the ball will start to turn. Or perhaps he could put his arm around Hoggard and his pace will increase drastically. That's one of the most ridiculous things I've seen written on here. If putting an arm around bowlers bowling who are bowling like average bowlers on a flat track will suddenly turn them into McGrath's, everybody would be doing it. You should write a letter to the Bangladesh and Zimbabwean captains. Get a clue.

I love the way that you're coming up with all this crap when you didn't even watch the game, ball by ball. You watched a few balls and then went to bed and then woke up and posted crap about Vaughan, like you usually do.

Get a clue.

furriner wrote:

Merlin wrote:...
Next time you bump into Jimmy Adams, ask him the question!!

Basically, an arm around your wayward quick, a quiet encouraging chat with him between overs: a re-set field to protect him from possible slaughter and finally, NOT screwing your eyes and gazing heavenward at a loose ball ... all these things help towards building confidence - yes, even on a shit track, and yes, even with a pussy like Harmison.

Get a clue??
I'd suggest you try playing the game rather than armchairing it.

Fark me Merlo, you've captained a team that had Jimmy Adams and/or cappoed against him?

Aye, a year back. he was the oppos 'ringer' ...
He did take us for 70 plus very quickly.. bagged a couple of our tailenders with some of his dibbly dobblers.
But what impressed was his flat arm throws to the keeper from the deep.
We never chanced a second on his throw.
We won - just.

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:

Get a clue.

FFS
Okay - Let's not go any further down this road.
I'll go away and attempt to "get a clue" from your inspirational claptrap.

PS You really do talk utter shite LLL ... just re-read your last post .. and then think "childishness".
You have it.

Oh look, nothing to say so it's the the old "move on" mantra! You can set your watch by it. Get a clue.

If replying to your post, point by point and imagining a scenario where putting your arm around people fixes everything is childish, then it's your own fault for posting such dogmatic, baseless, anti-Vaughan, nonsense.

Cheers mate.

Come back when you've gone and gotten your clue. Doh!

I find myself agreeing with LLL over Vaughan. Which is a bit worrying as the next thing you know he'll be sending me Frank Lampard posters.

You're only ever as good as the tools you have.

2008 vintage isn't even half as good as the 2005 variety...

taipan wrote:

taipan wrote:

Rob I wrote:They love talking about us.

Well it looks like England could lose this one and as there are no sheep shaggers here.

Very quick edit Rob. You realised the losing jibe wasn't going to work?

No - I remembered that the two Aussies I find offensive are on Ignore, and I don't want to wind up the others.

JKLever wrote:I find myself agreeing with LLL over Vaughan. Which is a bit worrying as the next thing you know he'll be sending me Frank Lampard posters.

You're only ever as good as the tools you have.

2008 vintage isn't even half as good as the 2005 variety...

Cheers Lever. Any tool with a brain can see that Vaughan does all he can. He changes the field and tries new things more than probably any other captain. If, at the end of the day, the pitch is flat and the bowlers aren't good enough, the captain can't do anything about it.

Btw, are you still in the "Fred as one of four bowlers camp" now?

taipan wrote:

JKLever wrote:

taipan wrote:

doremi wrote:SA will not take England 'to the cleaners', don't have the batsmen to do it.

In England we do. They have a weak attack.

Is it really any weaker than last time you were here? We seemed to change our bowling attack every test match on that tour and it was competitive in most of the matches.

Would have to go through the teams again.

Looking at it I can't see Simon Jones playing, Flintoff will probably not be up to speed if he does play. Hooggard will probably be a bit zippier with a couple of games under his belt and Sidebottom is useful. Panesar looks well below par.

Smith has a useful record in England and Gibbs might be back to open. And then there is Kallis.

Do you think England will be able to handle Steyn, Morkel, Ntini and Nel with Kallis still nipping in for a couple. I also think you might find that Harris is a bit underated.

Kallis averages "only" 37 with the bat in England. I have a sinking feeling that he might put that right this year! I also have a feeling that Prince will do well.

Simon Jones is practicing with the rest of the Worcestershire squad, and the word is that all's well so far. There is talk, however, that his fitness will need to be "managed" and we're not to expect him to play in every game.

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:

Btw, are you still in the "Fred as one of four bowlers camp" now?

Yes. What are 5 crap bowlers going to do that 4 won't?

Vorn bloody well better get a big ton here.

Merlin wrote:
Basically, an arm around your wayward quick, a quiet encouraging chat with him between overs: a re-set field to protect him from possible slaughter and finally, NOT screwing your eyes and gazing heavenward at a loose ball ... all these things help towards building confidence - yes, even on a shit track, and yes, even with a pussy like Harmison.

Or, you could do what MS Dhoni did:

AS Irfan Pathan prepared to bowl the final over in Tuesday's thrilling one-day match, with Australia requiring 13 runs to snatch an improbable win, Indian captain Mahendra Dhoni said to him: "Even you are not that bad, we can't lose from here."

The skipper's interesting man-management style is emblematic of a new India, aware yet unafraid of their standing and potential. All others saw Dhoni's arm around Pathan as a sign of urging and reassurance; the reality was a ribbing of a player who seemed to have lost his confidence after a hammering in Sydney.

And Pathan, emboldened by his team's series win, had this warning for what the Australians could expect the next time they visited India: "What goes around comes around, mate."

Facing Vettori I see Strauss has adopted the, 'can't be out there's no lbw' under 9s stance, but taken it one step further. His left big toe is in-line with off stump and his bat must be at least 10 inches further away. Very unusual.

Christ this match is boring. Nz better get a wicket so I can at least watch a bit of KP.

We're managing to outsnooze the snoozers FFS