Gus Fraser becomes a selector.

with a classic Clydesdale in a selectorial chair it is expected the Brezzy carthorse will continue to get a go...

Who really deserves their place, really?

Cook: 2nd worst captain I've seen. Can't bat for shit when it's not in his half quarter eighth.

Carberry: Meh, I'd keep him, but he hardly impressed.

Bell: One good series in the last two years.

Ballance: Did f*ck all - looked good doing it, but whatever.

Jonny Knicks: Spare me....

Borthwick: 'Oooh promising' dial-a-schlep.

Anderson: Meh. Yeah. But meh.

Broad: See Anderson.

Prior is a car crash. Bresnan is fully qualified in the gashweasel business.

That leaves you with sweet f*ck all, bar Stokes. Who phoned in his first innings battings efforts and fatted up on uber-complacent, series-over batsmen.

So that's half an Anderson, half a Broad, half a Stokes, half a Bell and fractions of the rest. It's a 15-car pile-up and the emergency services are having a coke-fuelled gangbang in the Savoy.

c'mon danny it is not that bad...we have the KING Dross Weazel (Clotto) and the whole of Spiv Central demanding his return...damned KFC and all their secret herbs and spices are undermining Boof....the deep fried turkey will win out here...we are sooooo stuffed (prosciutto, sage and onion)

Watson? Oh yeah, like we wouldn't kill for a batsman that could make 30 to 60.

horace wrote:c'mon danny it is not that bad...we have the KING Dross Weazel (Clotto) and the whole of Spiv Central demanding his return...damned KFC and all their secret herbs and spices are undermining Boof....the deep fried turkey will win out here...we are sooooo stuffed (prosciutto, sage and onion)

And you've got Mitchell Johnson, who could beat any team (well, perhaps any team not containing Brendon McCullum) on his own right now.

The standard of Test cricket's so ordinary right now that all you need is one player performing like Superman and two or three others clinging onto his cape, and opposition sides will crumble.

Good old jobs for the boys!

Job spec: be a good lad who actually probably isn't, who everyone thinks is useless/overrated, and certainly not qualified in any capacity!

Yup, ticks all the boxes there.

It's not healthy for a current coach to be a selector - there are guys like Chris Adams and Matthew Maynard who are not currently in work who are available.(Maynard might be doing some work behind the scenes at Glamorgan). On a practical level, they would have more time to get round more matches to see more players than the likes of Gus.

Basil wrote:It's not healthy for a current coach to be a selector - there are guys like Chris Adams and Matthew Maynard who are not currently in work who are available.(Maynard might be doing some work behind the scenes at Glamorgan). On a practical level, they would have more time to get round more matches to see more players than the likes of Gus.

Adams and Maynard had a reputation in their playing days of being a bit 'rebellious', so this current England set-up wouldn't touch them with a 10 foot barge pole.

And Maynard had a big falling out with Glamorgan about five years ago (it even led to his late son Tom quitting the County in disgust), so unless there's been some big changes in the Board Room, it's unlikely he's working there in any official capacity.

Why should the selectors even have to be English (or Welsh for that matter...)? Surely someone who would bring an outsider's perspective, who can watch county cricket and form an unbiased opinion on which players are cut out for international cricket, would be a great addition to the panel.

beamer wrote:Why should the selectors even have to be English (or Welsh for that matter...)? Surely someone who would bring an outsider's perspective, who can watch county cricket and form an unbiased opinion on which players are cut out for international cricket, would be a great addition to the panel.

The best England selector in recent times was Duncan Fletcher. Until his love affair with Gashley began.

Basil wrote:On a practical level, they would have more time to get round more matches to see more players than the likes of Gus.

 
Gus loves the TV camera and performing in front of it.
I remember the halcyon days when he pontificated (as a pundit) on some Bangles V Pakistan match on
Sky TV for 5 whole days whilst his charges were struggling against the likes of Derbyshire at the foot of
the 2nd Div some years back.
When remonstrating with him, his response was to "mind my own business, and his attending Sky was his business and no one else's".
It took Middlesex a further 3 years to climb out of the 2nd Div.
 
On another occasion he was all over the victorious England team after they beat Australia at Lord's in 2009 (?) mingling with the boys, beaming in front of the Sky cameras, dipping in to say a few words,
generally suited and booted for the occasion in which he played no part - whilst Middlesex were having
their arses handed to them way over at Leicestershire or somewhere too far for Gussie to travel to!
 
In a phrase - Gus is an attention seeking whore.
England selector  - bollocks to that. . . job for the boys, again.

Not a fan then, Merls.

PeterCS wrote:Not a fan then, Merls.

Does it show??!   

Shit, Merlos, we agree on something.

It must have gone wrong.

I'll meet you in Bognor Regis in six months time with different faces.

Bugger Bogner. . . !

Merlin wrote:Bugger Bogner. . . !

I think Dan just wanted to shake hands ...

He was expecting Prince Albert, and he got the Prince of Wales.

PeterCS wrote:He was expecting Prince Albert, and he got the Prince of Wales.

 
I just couldn't resist it  . . . apols to Monkeh  . . however, I think you'll find it was George V who uttered those immortal words on his deathbed, Petey . . . though where Albie the Kraut and the PoW popped in from I really couldn't say!!

You're right.

I wrongly associated the quote with Edward 7 - longest-sitting Prince of Wales ever, until recently (I think) being pipped for that gold medal by HRH Chuck Windsor - who was also infamous for his long-standing penchant for boozcarousing and whorigallivanting his way around the seaside resorts of his imperial mother's queendom!

Maynard and Adams? Shoot me if that ever happens!

Seems we are all agreed that Gus the selector was yet another wonderful decision in recent times!!