All Time Test Cricket's XI - Greatest Basketcases...

Long story........

Demelza wrote:Long story........

Then PM me the story.....if your rights have been restored that is?

JGK wrote:I vaguely recall that for one of the very early England tours of Aust (may have even been the first one) they first went to NZ and the keeper didn't make the trip to Australia in time for the first test because he was in gaol after a bar fight.

Ted Pooley

Batman wrote:

Demelza wrote:Long story........

Then PM me the story.....if your rights have been restored that is?

Well, Dello mailed me and asked if I wanted them back but I said not at the moment thanks.

Sure. Like they have mail in Cronwall.

Heheheheh. I already had Yuvraj pegged as a test loser all that time back. Time to update the list and make some more recommendations. Rohit Sharma [still at his 'peak' mind you], Dinesh Karthick, Irfan Pathan and Parthiv Patel for India.

Pakistan can update the whole of their present team full of matchfixers who deserve to be on the basket cases list [Akmal Bros., Mohammad Aamir, Salman Butt and who else?]

Paul Collingwood of England?

Paul Harris for SA?

Nathan Bracken for Aus?

Michael Slater XI

WideWally wrote:

JGK wrote:I vaguely recall that for one of the very early England tours of Aust (may have even been the first one) they first went to NZ and the keeper didn't make the trip to Australia in time for the first test because he was in gaol after a bar fight.

Ted Pooley

Pooley, who played for Surrey, was probably the outstanding wicketkeeper of his generation. In 1868, in a match against Sussex at The Oval, he had dismissed 12 victims (8c 4st), a world record that stood until 1996. He was the obvious choice as the wicketkeeper in Lillywhite's touring party of professionals that were to play the first 2 official Tests (though not known at the time). Unfortunately there was no reserve 'keeper.

The detour to New Zealand was necessary for financial reasons - they had arranged 8 "odds" matches although in the event the New Zealand leg proved to be a financial loss as well as almost drowning the tourists when their coach got caught in a swollen river.

Pooley's downfall was not drink, although he was not lacking in that vice, but the other great addiction of professional cricketers at that time, gambling. In Christchurch in a match involving Lillywhite's side against a team of 22 he found a spectator who was unfamiliar with a popular betting scam whereby Pooley forecast the likely scores of the opposing batsmen at odds of £! to 1s (i.e. 20-1). He said they would all score 0. In the event, in the 2 innings, there were 11 ducks. Pooley then demanded £11 - 33s (for the batsmen who did score) or £9 7s (worth over £650 in modern UK terms) from the hapless punter who not surprisingly refused to cough up. The consequent fight resulted in Pooley's arrest for assault and criminal damage whilst his teammates returned to Oz minus their wicketkeeper to play the first ever Test at the MCG in March 1877 and the follow-up match on the same ground two weeks later..

As a result Pooley missed his chance of representative honours although he continued to play for Surrey until 1883. Jack Selby, of Notts, is always given as the accredited wicketkeepr in the first 2 Tests although in fact Harry Jupp, Pooley's Surrey teammate, kept throughout both matches apart from the pre-lunch sessions on both first days.

Pooley finished his days in Lambeth Workhouse in the summer of 1907, aged 69, a largely forgotten figure, who could nevertheless be said to be responsible for transforming the wicketkeeping role from that of a short long-stop into a specialist fielding position. His Wisden obit remains diplomatically tactful to the last:

He was in many ways his own enemy, but even to the last he had a geniality and sense of humour that to a certain extent condoned his weaknesses

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:That guy who set people on fire.

Torquemada?

lardbucket wrote:Sure. Like they have mail in Cronwall.

Not if they spell it like that, they won't.

That's some massive NSR from AD. Or ignorance of forum convention.

Zat - Self-Appointed Master of Forum Etiquette

AD, if you can't take a little poke about NSR, or that you may have missed a long-running joke, then you need to take a good hard look at yourself.

While we're pointing out perceived flaws, at times, you can be up there amongst the most arrogant, self-aggrandising people on this board. Remember, you're the c*ck who accused me of longing for a return to communism in Russia and then chose to ignore several requests to clarify. Here's the thread in question... http://www.flamingbails.com/t10159-ok-are-americans-really-that-stupid

Zat wrote:AD, if you can't take a little poke about NSR, or that you may have missed a long-running joke, then you need to take a good hard look at yourself.

While we're pointing out perceived flaws, at times, you can be up there amongst the most arrogant, self-aggrandising people on this board. Remember, you're the c*ck who accused me of longing for a return to communism in Russia and then chose to ignore several requests to clarify. Here's the thread in question... http://www.flamingbails.com/t10159-ok-are-americans-really-that-stupid

He's still searching for the correct article on Wikipedia that is nothing to do with the point to post in his defence.

Something about how staring at images of Obama causes throat cancer or how liberal support for the Soviets in the 30s is to blame for Mark Cosgrove being too fat.

Russia would be better off with a Gorby and a solid central committee of comrades in charge...ditto Yugoslavis would have avoided all that dreadful vionece and death had it maintained a country led by Tito's bones

Allan D wrote:Zat - Self-Appointed Master of Forum Etiquette

Take 2 bananas and call me in the morning.

taipan wrote:

Allan D wrote:Zat - Self-Appointed Master of Forum Etiquette

Take 2 bananas and call me in the morning.

no homo

I don't think it's me who can't take a poke. I don't know what Ted Pooley or Cronwall have to do with nostalgia for the gulags. I think it's all a blood libel anyway.

Whatever you say Allan.

A polite explanation for AD. lardy and others have been deliberately spelling Cornwall incorrectly (Cronwall) since the C4 days.

What about them Danish pasties from Cronwall?

Allan D wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Sure. Like they have mail in Cronwall.

Not if they spell it like that, they won't.

oh dear ... whoosh ... perhaps I should have a hissy fit

lardbucket wrote:

Allan D wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Sure. Like they have mail in Cronwall.

Not if they spell it like that, they won't.

oh dear ... whoosh ... perhaps I should have a hissy fit

Going to do a Smerk on us?

what's Smerky done now?

I do note however that the farking slack qunts who wrote the glossary neglected to put 'Cronwall' in ...