Nothing about the football?

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:Howdy Lardy. I was reading one of Warne's biographies the other week. Guess what his favourite film is? Have a good guess.

From that intro, I don't need to. Do you call that a recommendation?

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:Howdy Lardy. I was reading one of Warne's biographies the other week. Guess what his favourite film is?

Anally Laws XI - Probe Bone Oh. (starring Judd Judee and Perri Maysun)

I thought he was God?

Lampard, Rushdie, Vaughan, and D&D.

Did you 'adopt' wounded and mangy animals when you were younger?

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:He's not fat you 'tard. He's just massive. 16 stone when he was Derby. Built like a brick shit-house.

Also, if you think Super Frank is fat, you're a dribbling slack-jaw who should be forcibly euthanized.

And I don't know what Geoffrey's talking about, he used to play centre back and he can tackle just fine. He's right about the pace but you don't need pace when you pass as well as him.

Juande Ramos thinks he's fat.

And your assertion that he is better than Carrick and Barry is ridiculous. Both of them are first choice at Top 6 teams, while he is on the fringes of a mid table one.

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:I thought he was God?

'Only' with a cricket ball in his hand.

[quote="lardbucket"]Lampard, Rushdie, Vaughan, and D&D.

Did you 'adopt' wounded and mangy animals when you were younger?[/quote]

Hush your mouth. Hush your face. Hush your stinkin' beak. You've never seen Super Frank play, you haven't offered a reasoned critique of Midnight's children, you don't appreciate Vaughany's genius, and you've never seen D&D so you're about as qualified to judge as Gary Glitter at a PTA meeting.

I've seen Lampard; why bother; nothing to appreciate after 2003; and I've seen the 'promo' which was nauseatingly poor.

[quote="PearlJ"][quote="Lara Lara Laughs"]He's not fat you 'tard. He's just massive. 16 stone when he was Derby. Built like a brick shit-house.

Also, if you think Super Frank is fat, you're a dribbling slack-jaw who should be forcibly euthanized.

And I don't know what Geoffrey's talking about, he used to play centre back and he can tackle just fine. He's right about the pace but you don't need pace when you pass as well as him.[/quote]

Juande Ramos thinks he's fat.

And your assertion that he is better than Carrick and Barry is ridiculous. Both of them are first choice at Top 6 teams, while he is on the fringes of a mid table one.[/quote]

Juande Ramos can suck my balls. And so can you. Dirk Kuyt is a regular for a top 6 team. He's still shit though.

lardbucket wrote:I've seen Lampard; why bother; nothing to appreciate after 2003; and I've seen the 'promo' which was nauseatingly poor.

You've seen Lampard with your untrained, shit-rules-watching eyes; because it'd give you a leg to stand on - at the moment, you're basically Shania Twain; nothing to appreciate if you're a simpleton; judging a book by its cover - shame on you.

What's D&D is like V&D but with extra diarrhoea?

Hmm... well unfortunately i cant disagree with the players you listed in retort.

Im obviously jaded from years of watching Arsenal play the beautiful game the way it should be played. To rephrase... to get in the Arsenal team these days you need pace, passing and technique. And an ability to hack if your name is Eboue.

eowyn wrote:What's D&D is like V&D but with extra diarrhoea?

not diarrhoea ... dire and direr

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:And I don't know what Geoffrey's talking about, he used to play centre back and he can tackle just fine. He's right about the pace but you don't need pace when you pass as well as him.

He still plays centre back when the need arises, what I meant to say is that he's not one of those all action up and down the pitch players, the sort of player needed to cover Gerrard in a 4-4-2 when he's off tear arsing all over the pitch. Like I said, I like Huddlestone, just like I liked Gascoigne, Hoddle and going back a bit the great Tony Currie. Alas, it's just not the English way.

All the great foreign national and european sides that play a supposedly talented passenger like Pirlo, Zidane, Riquelme, or even Hagi and Valderrama usually play a fluid 4-5-1/4-3-3 formation and surround their star playmaker with 'water carriers' of the calibre of Gattusso, De Rossi, Makelele, Mascheranas and the like. We've never played like that and probably never will, heartbreaking isn't it?

Geoffrey Trueman wrote:

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:And I don't know what Geoffrey's talking about, he used to play centre back and he can tackle just fine. He's right about the pace but you don't need pace when you pass as well as him.

He still plays centre back when the need arises, what I meant to say is that he's not one of those all action up and down the pitch players, the sort of player needed to cover Gerrard in a 4-4-2 when he's off tear arsing all over the pitch. Like I said, I like Huddlestone, just like I liked Gascoigne, Hoddle and going back a bit the great Tony Currie. Alas, it's just not the English way.

All the great foreign national and european sides that play a supposedly talented passenger like Pirlo, Zidane, Riquelme, or even Hagi and Valderrama usually play a fluid 4-5-1/4-3-3 formation and surround their star playmaker with 'water carriers' of the calibre of Gattusso, De Rossi, Makelele, Mascheranas and the like. We've never played like that and probably never will, heartbreaking isn't it?

Dimi not off to the IPL this winter then?

Oh, I despair.

Despite all the moaning, England do have a decent group of players to choose from. But for the last 3 years we have had a truly shocking team - I can't remember one good performance since we beat Argentina in 2005.

Teams like Croatia, Turkey, Germany, etc played some excellent football in Euro 2008 despite having a much inferior cast of players to England. But they were teams whereas we are just a rabble. No coherent selection or strategy.

Why don't we play to our strenghts - namely strength, pace, dynamic midfield running at a high tempo. Get two wingers on the pitch who will get down the touchline and attack the opposition. Rather than picking the most famous XI and plonking them all in the middle of the pitch to stand on each others toes. Its such a crying shame that that prick Barwick chose McLaren over Martin O'Neill. And now we have Capello, who will get us to the World Cup, but I doubt his cautious, safety first football will take us much further than the Second Round. It never worked for the Italy team over the past 25 years until they finally found a coach in Lippi who was prepared to show a bit of English style daring and gusto.

The players are there in the Premier League....

http://www.premierleague.com/page/Statistics/0,,12306,00.html

Despite all the expenisve foreign imports, the most effective midfielders are there 5 of the top 8 English.

Take Ashley Young for instance, pace, skill, a fantastic left foot with an eye for goal. Compare his performances for Villa with Beckham's for England. Beckham plays so deep these days he's virtually a right back. He can't beat a man, he rarely takes the simple option to play the simple pass. Instead he's too busy trying to play 50 yard glory balls. Young is the future, a top performer in the top league and hungry for international success, Beckham is jaded, selfish, playing in semi-competitive competition and inefficient. Guess who is apparently undroppable and who is not even in the squad?

So, to summarise - why aren't we building a new team with some young players, for the future?

We could easily have used these last 4 friendlies to play a proper team, rather than the same old rubbish.

Stick Joe Hart in goal, Micah Richards at right back, with Ferdinand and Cole two of the better defenders in Europe to build a solid back 4 - (look at the rabble that was Germany's back 4 by comparison - and they reached the final).

Ashley Young on the left wing, either Bentley or Joey Cole on the right, quick, skillful players who can make effective use of the ball in the final third and run at the opposition. Barry, Hargreaves and Carrick would all make effective central midfielders, (so could Gerrard and Lampard if they're prepared to be part of the team ethic. If not, we can do without them - we have plenty of other options. And FFS not Gerrard and Lampard in the same team!)

Out of the sum of those parts we could create a fine midfield capable of creating lots of chances for whoever partners the unselfish Rooney upfront.

Gary 111 wrote:
Teams like Croatia, Turkey, Germany, etc played some excellent football in Euro 2008 despite having a much inferior cast of players to England.

But who says they're inferior players? Richard Keys? Jamie Redknapp? Don't equate celebrity with ability. Not many in this country had heard of Arshavin, Pavlyuchenko and Zhirkov prior to Euro 2008 - didn't mean they weren't excellent players.

Remember England going into the last World Cup and the players repeatedly referring to themselves as a "golden generation" as they stank the place out?

It's all hype. Nothing more.

Take Ashley Young for instance, pace, skill, a fantastic left foot with an eye for goal. Compare his performances for Villa with Beckham's for England. Beckham plays so deep these days he's virtually a right back. He can't beat a man, he rarely takes the simple option to play the simple pass. Instead he's too busy trying to play 50 yard glory balls. Young is the future, a top performer in the top league and hungry for international success, Beckham is jaded, selfish, playing in semi-competitive competition and inefficient. Guess who is apparently undroppable and who is not even in the squad?

Young's right-footed actually, but I don't disagree that Beckham's a waste of time. He was a spent force in 2006, so to still see him trotting out for England as a specialist corner taker is a bit of joke.

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:

PearlJ wrote:

Lara Lara Laughs wrote:He's not fat you 'tard. He's just massive. 16 stone when he was Derby. Built like a brick shit-house.

Also, if you think Super Frank is fat, you're a dribbling slack-jaw who should be forcibly euthanized.

And I don't know what Geoffrey's talking about, he used to play centre back and he can tackle just fine. He's right about the pace but you don't need pace when you pass as well as him.

Juande Ramos thinks he's fat.

And your assertion that he is better than Carrick and Barry is ridiculous. Both of them are first choice at Top 6 teams, while he is on the fringes of a mid table one.

Juande Ramos can suck my balls. And so can you. Dirk Kuyt is a regular for a top 6 team. He's still shit though.

Er...no he's not.

Seriously? You're a member of the "Dirk Kuyt is not shit" club?

Must get lonely at the get togethers...

Dello wrote:Seriously? You're a member of the "Dirk Kuyt is not shit" club?

Must get lonely at the get togethers...

No, I'm member of the 'He's a pile of dog turd' club.
I was responding to the comment that he was a regular in Liverpool's team. Whch he blatantly isn't.

He plays for them every week. He played 49 times for Liverpool last season - 34 (of 38) games in the league.

If that's not a regular, I don't know what is.

Dello wrote:He plays for them every week. He played 49 times for Liverpool last season - 34 (of 38) games in the league.

If that's not a regular, I don't know what is.

Not this season. I doubt he will get many games in.

What are you talking about? Liverpool have played two games this season, and Kuyt has started both of them.

Dello wrote:

Gary 111 wrote:
Teams like Croatia, Turkey, Germany, etc played some excellent football in Euro 2008 despite having a much inferior cast of players to England.

But who says they're inferior players? Richard Keys? Jamie Redknapp? Don't equate celebrity with ability. Not many in this country had heard of Arshavin, Pavlyuchenko and Zhirkov prior to Euro 2008 - didn't mean they weren't excellent players.

Remember England going into the last World Cup and the players repeatedly referring to themselves as a "golden generation" as they stank the place out?

It's all hype. Nothing more.

I'm going from what I think here, not our dreary pundits.

Admittedly I don't watch too much European football, but from watching the UEFA Cup I knew that the likes of Zhirkov and Aniukov were class players. They certainly did well for my fantasy team!

But in my opinion England's players are up there with most European nations (if not Spain). The difference is in teamwork.

If you offered the German manager the choice of Ferdinand, Woodgate, Carragher, Terry, etc at centre half over Mertesacker and Metzelder he would bite your hand off. But the Germans overlooked their shortcomings with teamwork and organisation, playing to their strengths. From watching the Champions League and the Premier League it is clear the likes of Ferdinand, Rooney, the Coles, Lampard, Gerrard, Owen, Hargreaves et al are top, top players. I think they would make any squad in Europe - but we seem incapable of making a team worthy of the name out of the sum of its parts.

Compare the wonderfully organised, fluid and motivated Croatian team, moulded from a squad of players who with all respect would mostly struggle to get a game for a top Champions League team. Or the Turkish team, who made Colin Kazim-Richards look like a world beater! The difference is in strategy, management, motivation and organisation. Something none of our players lack playing European club football - (e.g. 10 out of 22 of the Big Cup Final).