ABB: Who should/will bat 6 for England vs Windies?

ANYONE BUT BOPARA.

The choices are picked from the following:

- players who have recently represented England in Test cricket, but are currently out of favour

- those batsmen who are currently in the England Lions squad, preparing to face the tourists

- non-Test players who have played for England in their most recent limited-overs matches.

Quinton de Kock

Anyone But Bopara!

Not convinced by any of them really. Who raided the cupboard marked "young batting talent"? Oh yeah, it's located in South Africa and we've locked away the key to it for seven years now!

Can we persuade Colly to make a comeback?

I voted Joe Root, he has the best name.

Bairstow would be worth a punt. Wont happen (barring a sudden string of injuries) but he'd be worth a punt. Seems like one of those batsmen coming in at five or six who bowlers fear bowling to because of what he's capable of doing against an old ball and tiring attack. Of course, over the next year or so, Ben Stokes would be the best option, assuming he gets over his injury problems and fulfils his potential.

slaw

I'd rather have Bopara in there, ATM. He's the most technically adept against spin bowling, bar possibly Patel (pish) and Compton (no shots versus). Not that I reckon Shillingford will be on by the time Bops gets to the wicket, but.....

Bopara. He might go all right, but he's only a stop gap until Stokes opens a can of toughen the f*ck up.

Johnny B might make it in due course, and Carbs is a good, solid back-up in the opening/number three slots.

The rest can shove it.

Thought this was going to be an ABBA concert. Ben St. Oakes, Does Your Mother Know. Jos Buttler. So yes, wouldn't mind anybody but Bopara.

Well, well, well.

8 votes.
8 mother-frakking votes.

What the f*ck are you fat ugly f*cks doing all day? Back in the old days, this would have been a guaranteed vote winner. We've had reached 14 or 15 votes, and 2 pages in the thread at least. Ian Bell would have been mentioned and at least two people would have joked about killing him. One other person would have suggested he enjoys anal insertions. Another member would have pointed out that Jonny Bairstow is ginger and that Samit Patel is rotund. Then we'd have gone off-topic into talking about our favourite masturbatory practices, as well as the best pornstars currently performing.

Oh well. It's a shambles.

Aye, I agree Chiv, it is a shambles.

Still, WTF are you doing? You minced off all sherbert styles a half year-odd back and now ye come here only to soundboard yersen. What is going on???

100 for Little Jimmy today. Hasn't done a lot for Notts so far but must be a nudge for the selectors?

I voted for Bops just to niggle Gus, but i'd quite like to see likkle Jimmy T get a go.

My voodoo works. I can put the Ravi Bopara doll away ... until next time. I have to say I'm quite pleased, though. Two series in a row I've hoped and prayed and begged and wished and cried for Bopara not to play, and both times he has suffered an injury. Is it all me? Am I the devil? Who cares? As long as we don't have to watch fat-faced Bopara batting for England in a Test Match ever again, I think we can all agree it's worth it.

And the winner is: Johnny B.

Who voted for him?