England squad announcement for India tour delayed until...

Won't be easy for India? Maybe not, but let's not discount the amount of weak-kneed girls England have in their Top 6. But, we'll be fine without KP. Basically because all the players will participate in the superduper X-Box tournaments. I'd give them a golf clap but I'm double-handing my cock in sheer excitement ATM.

Use your forehead and desk.

How do you think I wrote the post?

I thought you had a secretary to take everything down for you.

only his underthings

PeterCS wrote:I thought you had a secretary to take everything down for you.

I haven't even got a decent chair, let alone some drongo to get things wrong for me.

having a proper secretary would at least allow you to have your hands free

I'd have to put them on a training course, find them a desk, pick their outfits, read a book on how to treat your subordinates like subhumans.... it's all too much hassle. Whilst I have hands, anyway.

Or you could just say Cop a mouthful of this, and keep typing.

Induction Lite.

btw: Is your boss making you sit on an obsolete tower again, instead of splashing out on a proper chair?

PeterCS wrote:btw: Is your boss making you sit on an obsolete tower again, instead of splashing out on a proper chair?

utter, utter, utter, bastard

No, just some ricketing cum-stained chair from 1988. It goes with the 70's desk, early 2000s laptop and the scummiest high-viz imaginable. I've dreaded them up on many occasions about it... but the MD is such a tightwad (unless you're in his nepotistic clique) that it's futile.

Then I concur with Mr Lard.

It's alright though, I wear it like a medal. A medal of hatred, bitterness and scathing cynicism. It suits me.

Brass Monkey wrote:

PeterCS wrote:I thought you had a secretary to take everything down for you.

I haven't even got a decent chair, let alone some drongo to get things wrong for me.

Monkeh - with your use of the vernacular you'd be most welcome here - tho it might have to be via Nauru

their spinners probably aren't better than England's

Even though it could still go wrong. On form, they're, at least on Indian pitches they're better than whatever Swann and Monty could offer.

horace wrote:
Monkeh - with your use of the vernacular you'd be most welcome here - tho it might have to be via Nauru

The only other word I could think of at the time was 'bimbo' but I wanted to leave the sex of my hypothetical secretary ambiguous... I'm egalitarian like that.

Never let your dongle dangle in the dirt.

Brass Monkey wrote:

horace wrote:
Monkeh - with your use of the vernacular you'd be most welcome here - tho it might have to be via Nauru

The only other word I could think of at the time was 'bimbo' but I wanted to leave the sex of my hypothetical secretary ambiguous... I'm egalitarian like that.

..nice to read a bit of gold on a Friday morning