England v Australia, 1st Test, Cardiff, 8-12 July, 2015

who are the media clowns floating the idea that we will play 4 quicks?! dumb!

I guess they are underwhelmed at Elmer's performances to date.

Well, look at what happened last time we moved Root up the order.

For me, ideally you have your best shot player at 4. Number 3 is effectively a surrogate opener, has to be strong against the new ball as pretty much every other innings they will be in very early. There was a time we usually had three recognised openers in the side.

The middle order slots are fairly interchangeable and dependent on which slot a player prefers, but obviously the lower you bat, the less chance you have to build a big innings and the more chance you are left with the tail - which some batsmen thrive on of course. But Root's been so good at 5 it just seems counter-productive to move him just yet.

Ugh

"While the younger Marsh has turned plenty of heads with his bold batting on tour, the Australian team's decision-makers still feel Watson offers more security as a bowler. Without Harris, the control Watson can offer with miserly spells and swing of both conventional and reverse varieties will be even more highly valued. "

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FFS, pity they don't take into account that he can't score more than a Belf-like pretty 20 these days and is as soft as Nick Kyrgios at Wimbledon overnight.

skully wrote:

beamer wrote:Anyway, in terms of most hated players among forum members, is Merlin/Ballance now one to rival BBB/Prior, Bliksem/Dippenaar, doctorspin/Cook and vilks/Nadal?

I'm gutted skully/Twatson didn't get a mention.

probably because we all hate him as much as you do

1 more sleep!!!

who can sleep knowing how badly were gonna get swatted?

skully wrote:Ugh

"While the younger Marsh has turned plenty of heads with his bold batting on tour, the Australian team's decision-makers still feel Watson offers more security as a bowler. Without Harris, the control Watson can offer with miserly spells and swing of both conventional and reverse varieties will be even more highly valued. "

******
****** ****** ****** ****** ******
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Merlin wrote:

beamer wrote: I don't really know what the answer is, to be honest, other than him scoring a hundred in the opener to shut everyone up!
...

I would love to see that happen, and in the words of Paddy Ashdown,
"I would eat my 'at" ...  if it did ... a ton or two fifties at Cardiff will
(no matter how it's scored - as I would rather he was the glue around
which the others performed) - will exonerate him in my books ...

Glue as in boiled-down bits of horses' hooves?

Performed as in post-sniffing?

Ethics? The Gall! wrote:

skully wrote:

beamer wrote:Anyway, in terms of most hated players among forum members, is Merlin/Ballance now one to rival BBB/Prior, Bliksem/Dippenaar, doctorspin/Cook and vilks/Nadal?

I'm gutted skully/Twatson didn't get a mention.

probably because we all hate him as much as you do

Mea culpa, ETG, a fair call.

lardbucket wrote:Bugger off, I want 2006-07 or 2014-15 again.

It's been a tough time here recently and although it's unreasonable and against the odds, I want 5-0.

There are other things I want and fantasise about, but Elle McPherson, Rosamund Pike, and Emily Blunt have not been sighted in my bed recently, separately or together, and such blessings seem almost as unlikely as the above cricket scenario.

Sage. WTF was the SGDT thinking?

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Bugger off, I want 2006-07 or 2014-15 again.

It's been a tough time here recently and although it's unreasonable and against the odds, I want 5-0.

There are other things I want and fantasise about, but Elle McPherson, Rosamund Pike, and Emily Blunt have not been sighted in my bed recently, separately or together, and such blessings seem almost as unlikely as the above cricket scenario.

Sage.   WTF was the SGDT thinking?

Phuuuuurt.

skully wrote:

beamer wrote:Anyway, in terms of most hated players among forum members, is Merlin/Ballance now one to rival BBB/Prior, Bliksem/Dippenaar, doctorspin/Cook and vilks/Nadal?

I'm gutted skully/Twatson didn't get a mention.

1 more sleep!!!

apart from the fact you were singing his praises at one stage.....

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Bugger off, I want 2006-07 or 2014-15 again.

It's been a tough time here recently and although it's unreasonable and against the odds, I want 5-0.

There are other things I want and fantasise about, but Elle McPherson, Rosamund Pike, and Emily Blunt have not been sighted in my bed recently, separately or together, and such blessings seem almost as unlikely as the above cricket scenario.

Sage.   WTF was the SGDT thinking?

On a different wavelength entirely.

Still, so's taipan.  Too good for poor old Elle. What a turnup.

Foxsports News (on the Teev) claiming Vague is a certainty to make his Ashes debut and it's a straight shoot-out between Twat and Puddle.

And boys, please don't misunderstand. I would lap up a 5-0 but I am realistic enough to know that won't happen, so I wish for a classic.

lardbucket wrote:

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Bugger off, I want 2006-07 or 2014-15 again.

It's been a tough time here recently and although it's unreasonable and against the odds, I want 5-0.

There are other things I want and fantasise about, but Elle McPherson, Rosamund Pike, and Emily Blunt have not been sighted in my bed recently, separately or together, and such blessings seem almost as unlikely as the above cricket scenario.

Sage.   WTF was the SGDT thinking?

On a different wavelength entirely.

Still, so's taipan.  Too good for poor old Elle. What a turnup.

Esp as Taips is one of the few here older than her.

Good to see I am not alone in my admiration of Rosamund Pike.

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Bugger off, I want 2006-07 or 2014-15 again.

It's been a tough time here recently and although it's unreasonable and against the odds, I want 5-0.

There are other things I want and fantasise about, but Elle McPherson, Rosamund Pike, and Emily Blunt have not been sighted in my bed recently, separately or together, and such blessings seem almost as unlikely as the above cricket scenario.

Sage.   WTF was the SGDT thinking?

On a different wavelength entirely.

Still, so's taipan.  Too good for poor old Elle. What a turnup.

Esp as Taips is one of the few here older than her.

Good to see I am not alone in my admiration of Rosamund Pike.

Guys, it's a fantasy. Personally by fantasies have run younger than 51 regardless of my age at the time. Dress up Elle any way you like, but she will still taste of mutton.

Meh, you still pick Bradman in your All Time Teams don't you.

JGK wrote:Meh, you still pick Bradman in your All Time Teams don't you.

Yep, but doesn't mean I want to shag him.

beamer wrote:Anyway, in terms of most hated players among forum members, is Merlin/Ballance now one to rival BBB/Prior, Bliksem/Dippenaar, doctorspin/Cook and vilks/Nadal?

But my hatred is unconditional. He could give all his money to charity, lose to Federer for the rest of his career, suck me off every day for eternity and I would still call the deceitful little c*nt a prick. Because it would all be deceit, to try and make himself look good.

But he can't fool me. I know his game.

F*cking twat, I bet he gives terrible head as well.

You guys, you guys. Two words. Bruce Francis.

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:

JGK wrote:

lardbucket wrote:Bugger off, I want 2006-07 or 2014-15 again.

It's been a tough time here recently and although it's unreasonable and against the odds, I want 5-0.

There are other things I want and fantasise about, but Elle McPherson, Rosamund Pike, and Emily Blunt have not been sighted in my bed recently, separately or together, and such blessings seem almost as unlikely as the above cricket scenario.

Sage.   WTF was the SGDT thinking?

On a different wavelength entirely.

Still, so's taipan.  Too good for poor old Elle. What a turnup.

Esp as Taips is one of the few here older than her.

Good to see I am not alone in my admiration of Rosamund Pike.

Re Elle: I reckon she'd still be firmer and tastier, not to mention downright nicer, than 90% of the 2015 vintage iGen slappers half her age.

Re Rosamund: Phwoar.

Brass Monkey wrote:I think of Nick Compton as someone who was done for after a brief bad run

I think of Nick Compton as someone who turned up on an American TV show and danced in his underpants.



This happened. He can never play for England again.

lardbucket wrote:Re Elle: I reckon she'd still be firmer and tastier, not to mention downright nicer, than 90% of the 2015 vintage iGen slappers half her age.

Re Rosamund: Phwoar.

sage
on both counts

Dello wrote:

Brass Monkey wrote:I think of Nick Compton as someone who was done for after a brief bad run

I think of Nick Compton as someone who turned up on an American TV show and danced in his underpants.

Jesus, in that case I'd be trying not to think about him at all!

skully wrote:

Ethics? The Gall! wrote:

skully wrote:

beamer wrote:Anyway, in terms of most hated players among forum members, is Merlin/Ballance now one to rival BBB/Prior, Bliksem/Dippenaar, doctorspin/Cook and vilks/Nadal?

I'm gutted skully/Twatson didn't get a mention.

probably because we all hate him as much as you do

Mea culpa, ETG, a fair call.

Yeah, maybe Australians/TAYne POCson would have been a more appropriate inclusion.

I was going to bring up the merits of Elle Mac, plus many other smashes, when Dello goes and rehashes the Compton shuffle. My balloon has shrunk.

Merits? Is that what you call them now?