England won the Ashes (Australia lost them)

ever hopeful wrote:To be fair to footwork, anyone whose great grandfather didn't steal/shag sheep for a living probably gives off an "upper class vibe" to most Australians. They probably think Frank Skinner's quite posh too.

ever hopeful wrote:To be fair to footwork, anyone whose great grandfather didn't steal/shag sheep for a living probably gives off an "upper class vibe" to most Australians. They probably think Frank Skinner's quite posh too.

Ello Mr. Whoeverhopeful

I axed my mum what shag men and she sed it was a roolly bad word and no-one with any breedin wood say it. She sed Whoever said it mus have no class at all. I was rool spuked when she new your name!! She's got PMT my mum!! An then she made me go to my room agin fer sayin stuff that wasn noice! Bugga! Now I carn wach Merican Idle this week, all corz of you!

An she sed I shooden tork to strange men online. They cood be murdrers or maaad men - she said sumpfink about jus like the royal family - I dunno, she sez a lotta junk I dun git.

She sed the Inglish were stoopid fer sending me great grandfather ere, corz he got to live in parad - heaven - and yoos lot got to stay in purg - hell. She sed it was calma, corz me gg was juz trine to stop from stavin to deth and feed his kids and the pro he was shacced up wif.

My mum is hell smart. She sed lyyyyy ftse ya shood no more bout histry, coz then ya can see wot we shood do now...and she sed ppl who fink there upa class are rooly preten - up emselves.

Well I'm hungry now and I wanna eat sumpfink. Fink I'll have sumathat leftova lam.
See yas orite?

Can someone read the above and tell me if it's funny, chippie, both or neither?

Pretty big rise though, you'll admit. I was using the old sheep-shagger bait. Never known it fail yet.

Wait until Horrie arrives. He will decipher it for you.

ever hopeful wrote:Pretty big rise though, you'll admit. I was using the old sheep-shagger bait. Never known it fail yet.

Don't drag me into your debate.

I like the word "debate". I thought I was just being annoying.

Try harder.

Well, I like a challenge , but why make the effort when you just have to make a throwaway remark about convicts or sheep, and the other fella jumps right into the net. I'm off to shoot fish in a barrel instead.

footwork wrote:

ever hopeful wrote:There's no need for anyone to respond to this thread; I just started it because I like seeing the words up there when I log on. I'll probably add to it from time to time just to keep it on the front page.

I must inform you Sir that your opening statement is a Tautology.
Thus, it is erroneous!!

As an 'added bonus', I am 'first introducing' these grammatical findings for your consideration; and am making to you a 'free gift' of this knowledge, that you might 'understand the reason why' tautology is not recommended, while 'planning ahead' to your next thread-title.



Aussies still rule!! (even if figuratively)

Footsie is the new Red?

That many emoticons reminds me of merlo or banalman.

bear debating?

ever hopeful wrote:Pretty big rise though, you'll admit. I was using the old sheep-shagger bait. Never known it fail yet.

We both know the only bait you appreciate and the only rise you get, but I think you should keep your private life to yaself and stop braggin bout it.

Blimey, he's still champing on the hook! Should I throw him back?
There...swim little Footwork, swim and be happy!

He?

footwork is as female as Red!

Is she? Oh well, I'm still putting her back.

Still playing with yourself I see.

I would be, but you keep coming back. Honestly, Footsie, you're free to go! I mean it....SWIM! SWIM! Out into the wide blue yonder! Look, there she goes! Have you ever seen a prettier sight.? Let's leave her be now. A wild thing can never truly be owned anyway...

I like being smug about winning as much as the next man but EH is even starting to get on my nerves now...

Meh, the smugness might keep wim warm at night in a different way from wetting his bed.

But if England don't win a match in the next year, which is possible given the shit they've produced in the ODIs, it might be all he's got left.

EH has a lot of balls?? Freakshow??

EH may be John Laws.

vilkrang wrote:I like being smug about winning as much as the next man but EH is even starting to get on my nerves now...

Actually, I'm even starting to p1ss myself off.
Still, better bump this thread back onto page one again I suppose.

And up she goes again...

Good morning your arseholiness.

Enjoying your own weak personality/ies again?

If you want a rise, and that makes you feel big, then you've got it.
Not regarding the English win, about which I, like most of the other Aussies, have been pretty fair and congratulatory, but for the weakness of who you are, in trying to demean someone else just because you can.
So go ahead sport.
Keep congratulating yourself and then writing Mills and Boon prose about fish.
You're a hero.

btw, one of the lowest forms of comeback is criticising typos, so I'm waiting for that next.
And I'm angry with myself, because I've never wilfully demeaned anyone on this forum; but you're just scum.