England v Australia, 5th Test, The Oval, 27-31 July, 2023

Most satisfactory series. Great to watch. And then:

England lost the Ashes.

Australia lost this Test.

It’s 2-2 so basically both sides lost the series.

Look at it with squinty eyes and Eng and Aus both lost. That in my book is an excellent result. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

lardbucket wrote:Stokes wants to be there in the next Ashes series.

Might need to work on his spin…

furriner wrote:Most satisfactory series.  Great to watch.  And then:

England lost the Ashes.

Australia lost this Test.

It’s 2-2 so basically both sides lost the series.

Look at it with squinty eyes and Eng and Aus both lost. That in my book is an excellent result.  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

And India lost the WTC, so we’re all square. All losers!

Crazy end to a crazy series, an epic even when a comedy of errors took over from time to time. Never possible to tell at any stage what would happen next.

The visitors played the smarter cricket for the msot part; the home team showed a lot of heart not always associated with cricket teams representing that country - even if they (esp batting) misread their own programme, and confused rashness for adventurousness.

A series that was unpredictable also for confounding conventional wisdoms, e.g.:

"catches win matches, spills lose them" - well, there were a lot of bad drops as well as massive takes on either side - it was just part of the ebb and flow and was not generally as decisive as you'd exprect, with so much else going on, so many factors.

"you can't keep selecting people who fail" - well, Warner had his best match at the end, as probably did Mo. (Maybe the obvious was however true of Jimmy, who should never have played more than 3 Tests at most, maybe 1, 3, 5. Four Tests was at least one too far.) And Crawley had gone into the series still uncertain of his place under anyone but Big Mac & Stokes.

"You can't be that negative in field settings (Australia, esp in Tests 1 & 2) or headlong in batting (England), and hope to win a Test."

Some good signs for Australia:

Having once threatened to be another Bruce Reid, Cummings stuck at his bowling - and captaincy - over six Tests like a stalwart, and a highly skilled one at that.

No doubt the door will reopen for Lyon, who of course was missed. But Murphy showed himself ready to step into his big shoes when called on.

Because the worry with the team is age. THey need to bring on successors. Neser, Behrendorff and Tye are not getting any younger - Jhye Richardson? Life as a fast bowler is hard, but if he is another who can shake off injury, maybe an Indian summer?

I don't know what to say about the members of this England team, other than to say they will need at least two if not three bowling successors, through retirements and injury. They need to work on Wood to get & keep him strong & match fit, because he is a proper strike bowler while he lasts. Woakes too. Hard to see Archer returning, really. Pity Tongue did not get at least one more Test. Looked very good.

The schedule of this Ashes series was insane.

Well bowled Stuart Broad, whatever you think of his antics and gimmicks. Would that all seamers had his longevity, fitness regime, skill and determination.

Was 2-2 a fair series result? I've no idea. It was 23 days of whirr.

Congratulations to Cummins and his men for guts and guile, and bringing home the urn.

Yeah, as has been said a few times, both teams need to move on, especially in the bowling department. Not too sure who our successors are in that regard either, they come and go so quickly through injuries, which makes Anderson and Broad’s combined 1300 or so wickets so remarkable.

Not the overall quality of 2005 but certainly matched it for excitement. Do they still do series highlights DVDs, or some sort of digital equivalent?

Incidentally, this is the first time since 1900 that a team has failed to win outright in six consecutive away (or home) Ashes series

Well done England.

Close series between two average teams.

The cricket was let down by poorly behaved crowds whipped up by shrill media

Hopefully the standard of cricket improves for the next series.

Which by the way is in Oz, home of honest pitches, well behaved crowds and good weather - barring Manchester -in-Sydney.

The expected result is the standard 4-0.

We were closer to winning the series in 2019.

A regulation bowlers’ take of the ball away. A review away. A sighted umpire away.

The 100/T20 has nothing on this.

Most of the people i watch cricket with were of the opinion that england would never beat oz playing their usual way, but it seemed to me that stokes himself tempered his own approach in the last 2 tests, so although he wont admit it maybe he learnt something from the 'mistakes' in the 1st 2 tests. other pro bazballers just think it was all down to those dropped catches/missed chances. there were a lot of them.

Going forward Wood needs to put his feet up and hope his heels recover before the WC. Luckily we dont have any tests before next year, but I wonder if jimmy will reconsider; does he really want to go and play 5 tests
in india where he have even less chance of success than
this series?

Stokes was seen bowling in the nets as usual during the intervals and was leaping about all day like a salmon,
so maybe his knee is getting better. But it would be
much better if he had a month off now, rather than
play in the silly 100.

Broad is gonna be very diff to replace, Yobbo isnt as quick,
so maybe Stuart can coach Tongue as a replacement.

Surely though 1 of the most entertaining test series of modern times.

Australia won two matches, England won two matches, one was drawn which given its full ration of time would probably (but not , and especially in this series never, definitely) have been won by England. Both teams had their moments. Both captains had their moments. Most participants, even including the dreaded Warner person, had their moments. In time, after the Kathikian stats manipulation, the 'moral victory' and 'spirit of cricket' hogwash and the tears and spittle from the SBM whinging and chest-thumping (and the healthy doses of the former thinly disguised as the latter) dries up, that 2-2 score-line, and the skilful and brave cricket played to get there, will be remembered.

Mango McCullum predicted not much beer being drunk after the series after the Carey- Bairstow Incident. I wonder if he saw the Broad Guard-of-Honour Incident and stood by that view.

Speaking of McCullum, if I ever hear or read the word 'Bazball' again it will be too soon.

Seems like England is rather selective in their "spirit of the game" mantra
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Well whodathunk???

horace wrote:Well done England.

Close series between two average teams.

The cricket was let down by poorly behaved crowds whipped up by shrill media

Hopefully the standard of cricket improves for the next series.

Which by the way is in Oz, home of honest pitches, well behaved crowds and good weather - barring Manchester -in-Sydney.

The expected result is the standard 4-0.

Most likely. 

Spesh seeing as Australia's fourth last Test victory in England was in August 2019, whereas England's fourth last win in Oz was in January 2003. 

If you exclude series result 'dead rubbers', the latter date goes back to Boxing Day 1998, and if you further tighten the criteria to take out fate-of-the-Ashes DRs, that fair-haired bloke in the Roger Federer headband who just retired after a 15 year career, and got the guard of honour? His Dad made a century in that game. He himself was six months old.

Watched until the bitter end. The 4-11 spell killed us after Smudge and Trav looked to be cruising.

No bad batting just that farking "new old" ball that went sideways after being introduced. It was so good the English didn't bother to take the 2nd new ball for fear that it wouldn't do as much as Joel Wilson's magic ball.

Well done England on the win.

Well done Australia on retaining.

A great series not without controversy.

Viva la Ashes!!

lardbucket wrote:Margin of 50 currently. So we’ve had two wins by 50 runs or less, and two by three wickets or less.

Aye. Very evenly matched series.

Just lies from Stokes about the obvious snub on drinks. The most ungracious hosts ever.

I do wonder about the reception the Poms will receive here. I expect some will find excuses to not tour. That will give their media something else to whine about, oh we sent out our B team.

Those that do will cop an unmerciful hammering. Really Hope Fatty Dropstow makes it.

It will be two very different teams by then. Still think we’re a long way from discovering the magic formula to win over there but having players without the baggage of the past (and Jimmy, who’s actually done it before ) might help.

The Bazball batting approach could work Down Under, but the issue is getting 20 wickets with a Kookaburra when fielding a typical English seam attack. We need genuine pace and (less likely) high-class spin.

As for drinks, it’s an individual choice, no obligation to socialise with the opposition during or after a series. It didn’t degenerate into Mankading and deliberate shoulder barges etc. but certain things will be remembered.

‘Certain things will be remembered’

English team and insightless supporters in high horse arrogant hypocrite wanker shocker

To be fair, Bharat Sundaresan will say water is bright pink if the Australian team told him to. Living off that one Patrick Patterson article from ages ago.

time for a cleanout

lardbucket wrote:‘Certain things will be remembered’

English team and insightless supporters in high horse arrogant hypocrite wanker shocker

Long live the high horse arrogant hypocrite wankers, fark off the Aussie cheats.

Anyway… was indeed the highest-scoring Test ever without a century, the previous record being held by a SA-Eng Test in 1928.

skully wrote:Watched until the bitter end. The 4-11 spell killed us after Smudge and Trav looked to be cruising.

No bad batting just that farking "new old" ball that went sideways after being introduced. It was so good the English didn't bother to take the 2nd new ball for fear that it wouldn't do as much as Joel Wilson's magic ball.

Well done England on the win.

Well done Australia on retaining.

A great series not without controversy.

Viva la Ashes!!

Wonder if this was because they couldn't risk bowling the grand old man Jimmy and Wood was problematic. They appeared to want to rotate Woakes and Broad with Ali and maybe the old ball worked better with this.

Heard Mark Prickolas on before the start of play last night and he said that Anderson is totally cooked. Why is he in denial??

Red wrote:

skully wrote:Watched until the bitter end. The 4-11 spell killed us after Smudge and Trav looked to be cruising.

No bad batting just that farking "new old" ball that went sideways after being introduced. It was so good the English didn't bother to take the 2nd new ball for fear that it wouldn't do as much as Joel Wilson's magic ball.

Well done England on the win.

Well done Australia on retaining.

A great series not without controversy.

Viva la Ashes!!

Wonder if this was because they couldn't risk bowling the grand old man Jimmy and Wood was problematic. They appeared to want to rotate Woakes and Broad with Ali and maybe the old ball worked better with this.

Heard Mark Prickolas on before the start of play last night and he said that Anderson is totally cooked.  Why is he in denial??

Well, he was world number one less than a year ago, can his powers decline that quickly? If he was 21 or even 31 it would just be a case of “out of form”. Though great NFL QBs do often have a “drop off a cliff” season around age 40…

We can’t afford to carry him for a year or two, anyway, at the expense of finding a successor. Would be interesting to understand his reasons and objectives for carrying on (700? Second on the all-time list/first non-chucker? Proving a point to Broad? Or genuine designs on 2025/26?)

Another rare statistical event, a 5-match series without a run out (the Mariah-kad went down as a stumping…)