Re: London Mayor: The nothing to do with Langer and Fred thread

[Basil]

Boris Johnson
Jeffrey Archer
Ken Livingstone
Frank Maloney


All past or present candidates... seems like it's the equivalent of the milk prefect* at school.



(Did anyone ever have a milk prefect...?)

David Mellor reminds me of some of the prefects I remember - smarmy, ugly, arrogant and utter tw@ts

[Guest]

I'm sure this is a joke that's gone too far.

Someone said 'wouldn't it be hilarious to put Boris in a position of power, I mean, he is a bungling toff about as in touch with the common man as Robinson Crusoe, but he is lovable in a lost kind of way...', and then all of a sudden he's on the verge of running the capital city of a major world power.

It's terrifying.

How long before he puts his foot in his mouth and kicks off a riot? Or before the bus drivers strike?

[Basil]

London is going to get the Mayor it deserves.

[filosofee]

Voted for Brian the policeman for Mayor and Green party/members in the other two votes.

If it is Boris, not bad for a grand or great-grandson of a Turkish/Muslim immigrant,; guess he'll refrain from repeating the "piccanny with water-melon smiles" comment in the future.

[filosofee]

London is going to get the Mayor it deserves.

Not really Basil. Can't blame Londoners, they're sick of congestion charge-Ken (including one brother who drives a Range Rover), and no-10%-lower-tax Gordon. 'New Labour' is really 'old conservative' and 'new conservative' is the true 'new Labour' - it's so mixed up, I'll continue voting Green!

[Allan D]

Exit polls published in Metro this morning suggest a narrow win for Ken.

A paper distributed free on the Tube. I don't even believe the weather forecast in that. What's the matter, doesn't your benefit stretch to the Standard?

I can get cheaper bog roll from Tesco's.

The Metro is free (as is London Lite, the LondonPaper, & The Londoner). 9.5 tonnes of free paper every day. How environmentally friendly! No need to go to Tesco's at all. Bit rough though. All produced by Associated Newspapers (publishers of the Standard) too, btw.

[Basil]

London is going to get the Mayor it deserves.

Not really Basil. Can't blame Londoners, they're sick of congestion charge-Ken (including one brother who drives a Range Rover), and no-10%-lower-tax Gordon. 'New Labour' is really 'old conservative' and 'new conservative' is the true 'new Labour' - it's so mixed up, I'll continue voting Green!

But Boris Johnson though!! This is the man who will be the formal face of London for the next four years - right up to the Olympics. Madness, utter madness.

[lardbucket]

Apparently bookies are already paying up for a Boris Johnson victory. Good grief.

It'd be funny if it wasn't so.... no, wait - it is funny. Hilarous, even. Only in Britain could a semi-retarded, delusional, befuddled, incompetent, socially inept buffoon carve out a successful career as a politician.

Is he limited to two terms?

[Merlin]

No.
As many as he can win.

Ken had two terms (8 years) ... which was just long enough for him to bog up a great city.

[JKLever]

So, what exactly has Boris pledged to do for Lahndoners that has made you all jump ship to the buffoon?

[Hass]

I think it's clear that Britons have a history of not taking mayoral elections seriously.

Monkey Mascot Elected Mayor.

Johnson's win shows that Labour is really on the nose. It's at times like this when I'm glad Australia only has three year terms. There's nothing worse than having to put up with a government that looks like it just walked off the set of 'The Night of the Living Dead'.

[furriner]

I think it's clear that Britons have a history of not taking mayoral elections seriously.

I don't pity the f*ckers. What, if I may be so bold as to enquire, were Londoners doing when when Boudicca was flogged, her daughters raped? Did they take out a street protest? Did they represent to Tacitus, singing 'We shall overcome'? Did they write a note to the Celts politely asking them to desist? I ask you. No sympathy for Londonium!

[Guest]

So, what exactly has Boris pledged to do for Lahndoners that has made you all jump ship to the buffoon?

He'll get rid of the bendy buses and put conductors back on "modern Routemasters".

Never mind that he got his sums wrong. He quoted £8M for this, then realised it would be £114M, and nobody picked him up on it.

His campaign was run on the lines of product hypnosis: "if you are scared on the streets, if you are frustrated on your daily commute, vote for change". He went for the hearts while Ken went for the heads. Big mistake, Ken. You forgot that most people are stupid.

Johnson is Mayor of London. Christ help us.

[Eric Air Emu]

Can Boris really be as potentially catastrophic as he comes across? I'm sure there's a serious intellect there, but competence?

Londoners are stupid by and large I'm afraid, especially the small minded little Englanders living in 'greater' London. I'm moving to Northampton...

[Guest]

Can Boris really be as potentially catastrophic as he comes across? I'm sure there's a serious intellect there, but competence?

Oh, he's bright enough, but then there's the "pickaninnies" comment Filo alluded to regarding a large number of the children of his city.

The bendy buses. So he gets rid of them. He had to buy two "modern Routemasters" to take the passenger load of each bendy. That's two drivers and two conductors instead of one driver on the bendy. The wage and pension costs quadruple.

One day, on the 436 through Deptford, some chavs on the top deck knife the conductor.

Horrified, the busmen strike for one day, the first time in years they have struck. Transport around the centre of town shuts down.

Boris has no idea how to deal with the union and messes up the negotiations.

Strikes continue. The tubes and trains cannot cope and people are forced back into their cars. Boris panics, the C-charge is abolished and we are back to the clogged up city centre we had in 1999.

Go Boris.

[JKLever]

There are things to love about Boris of course, especially this 'tackle' on a German in a charity match!!!

[Guest]

That is the most evil foul ever!

[Allan D]

I think it's clear that Britons have a history of not taking mayoral elections seriously.

I don't pity the f*ckers. What, if I may be so bold as to enquire, were Londoners doing when when Boudicca was flogged, her daughters raped? Did they take out a street protest? Did they represent to Tacitus, singing 'We shall overcome'? Did they write a note to the Celts politely asking them to desist? I ask you. No sympathy for Londonium!

She got her own back, though:

"The slaughter which fell upon London was universal. No one was spared, neither man, woman, nor child. The wrath of the revolt concentrated itself upon all those of British blood who had lent themselves to the wiles and seductions of the invader. In recent times, with London buildings growing taller and needing deeper foundations, the power-driven excavating machines have encountered at many points the layer of ashes which marks the effacement of London at the hands of the natives of Britain."

W.L.S.Churchill, "A History of the English-Speaking Peoples, Vol.1: The Birth of Britain."

(Something very similar occurred before the Home International Championship was abolished).

[Eric Air Emu]

69,000 votes for the BNP...puts Boris voting into perspective I guess.

[Allan D]

69,000 votes for the BNP...puts Boris voting into perspective I guess.

Can't quite see the connection, somehow. I notice the far-left collapsed because of the fall-out between Galloway and the SWP. Obviously the steam is going out of the anti-war brigade.

[Lara Lara Laughs]

No.
As many as he can win.

Ken had two terms (8 years) ... which was just long enough for him to bog up a great city.

Just out of interest, merlin, how exactly did Livingstone bog up the city?

[Winkle Spinner]

Can Boris really be as potentially catastrophic as he comes across? I'm sure there's a serious intellect there, but competence?

Londoners are stupid by and large I'm afraid, especially the small minded little Englanders living in 'greater' London. I'm moving to Northampton...

I'm afraid there is absolutely no correlation between intelligence and competence. I, for example, can solve second order differential equations in my head, but only this morning got last on the 12 minute walk between the station and my home of 14 years. It's tragicomic.

[JKLever]

Bit of a strange one this, it seems those living in central areas of London most affected by the congestion charge voted to keep red Ken in?

[Lara Lara Laughs]

Eh? Central Londoners love Ken. He's de-congested central London, reduced pollution and made it possible to actually get to places. It's the people on the outskirts who hate him because they either have to pay it if they want to drive in or they have to use public transport.


Plus, Ken is very popular amongst poorer, multicultural, inner city folk.

[Allan D]

Bit of a strange one this, it seems those living in central areas of London most affected by the congestion charge voted to keep red Ken in?

Errr...actually, no. It is those who live outside the congestion charge area but who have to come into it who are most affected by it.

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