Re: FORUM GOLD

by horace Fri 14 Dec 2012, 04:21

the redoubtable Monkeh considers the recent career of IRBell

Brass Monkey wrote:
I Ron Cubbard this year:

14 Tests, 556 runs @ 27.8.

If you want to take out WI:

12 Tests, 334 @ 18.55.

You heard me.

TBH, it all started going wrong when Trev was literally doing the dildo-bouncing beat off about him. Trevved him up good and proper. The reason he's even worse than usual is because Trev basically still talks about him like he's 'Sexy Mr 100'.

by skully Fri 14 Dec 2012, 04:27

by horace Fri 14 Dec 2012, 04:33

twas classical Monkeh Very Happy

by PeterCS Fri 14 Dec 2012, 12:16

Platinum. It's time someone invented FORUM PLATINUM.

by horace Sun 16 Dec 2012, 22:40

twould just be a monkeh tribute thread

by tricycle Mon 28 Jan 2013, 01:35

Had to be in

Brass Monkey wrote:
Red wrote:
Because he is often afforded the luxury of the 'bored' excuse while others will get canned for making runs albeit slowly. Don't think 'superman' has done anything much more this series than some of the maligned troops. Nothing especially match-winning anyway.

Oh, FFS - you're entirely missing the point:

How did he do against Pakistan? How is Warner doing? How did India do against Pakistan? How is Warner doing? What is the pitch like? Were the bowlers taking it easy because they'd had a night on the tiles? Did the sun come out? Did the sun go in? How is David Andrew Warner holding up? Did the wind change? Pakistan? Pakistan? Pakistan?

Pakistan?

How did Australia do against Pakistan? How did Australia do against Australia? How did Warner do against Australia? How did Warner do against Pietersen? Does Warner get as much out of Sesame Street as Pietersen? How did Iceland do against Pakistan? How did Pakistan do against Pakistan? How quickly did Warner score his runs? Warner? Warner? Michael Clarke? No, Warner? Pakistan? Is Pietersen worse than Warner because he's taller? Is Warner so great because he's small, but not-too-small, but tall but small? Pakistan? Warner? Runs quicker? Tired bowlers? Flat pitches? Ajmal? Doosra? Whoosra? Teesra? Pakistan? KP? Nuts? Pietersen? Kevin? David? Kevin? Pakistan?

by horace Wed 20 Feb 2013, 23:02

this had to be in too....sorry Henry

Brass Monkey wrote:Can't trust Trev. Not as far as you could throw his chardonnay.

If Trev says the weather in your town is going to be lovely tomorrow, you get the f*ck out of your town, because there's going to be a meteor shower. Or a zombie rapist plague.

Either way - burning rocks or zombie semen in your anus - it goes to show: you do NOT trust Trev.

In fact, if Trev says the weather in your town is going to be lovely tomorrow, you fly to Sydney on the next plane out and burn his house down. You burn his house down, because he's likely to sneeze. Why's that bad? Because the sneeze will probably have a butterfly effect and your head will get zapped with lightning. Your cock will be blown off by electricity. You'll start to bleed out and the last vision you have will be a zombie rapist chomping on your blown off member. Your last feeling will be a zombie cock SHOOTING MUNGE INTO YOUR ANAL PASSAGE!

So, yeah, don't trust Trev. Onions is a dobber. Onions are a played out vegetable. Onions make you cry. The ancient Egyptians worshipped onions. Blah blah blah.

How's Michael Munday, Trev? Is he steadily burgeoning toward greatness, Trev? Or is he turning tricks for new PS3 games down at the Taunton flea pit, Trev? You're a sick man. Playing God, like so many others have attempted. You're done, Trev. You can't hack the power, Trev. If you're still on top this time next year, I'll make damned sure there'll be a clash of the Titans.

by taipan Tue 18 Jun 2013, 20:32

See you admit it!

FAKE, FAKE, fake, FAKE, fake.

Dello is a ninety-six year-old gardener from Alabama who spends his days off masturbating and testing out his auto-erotic internet machine that spews out cricket words.

Brass Monkey is a forty-seven year-old retired porn star going through hormone replacement.

Skully is a twelve year-old girl with an iPhone, iPad, iPeriod, iInternet, who has a gadget, television and computer addiction. In between pretending to like cricket she spends her time on facebook saying stupid things to take screenshots off and post on here.

Lardbucket is a four-million year-old automatron programmed to identify patterns in software and revive them periodically for no actual reason.

LIES, lies, LIES.

Bona fide gold

http://www.flamingbails.com/t14010p30-am-i-real#729709

by lardbucket Sun 25 Aug 2013, 02:18

horace wrote:the redoubtable Monkeh considers the recent career of IRBell

Brass Monkey wrote:
I Ron Cubbard this year:

14 Tests, 556 runs @ 27.8.

If you want to take out WI:

12 Tests, 334 @ 18.55.

You heard me.

TBH, it all started going wrong when Trev was literally doing the dildo-bouncing beat off about him. Trevved him up good and proper. The reason he's even worse than usual is because Trev basically still talks about him like he's 'Sexy Mr 100'.

Well?

by Brass Monkey Sun 25 Aug 2013, 09:54

Well? Trev renounced his love for Ian Bell, took down his shack, that was situated outside Ian Bell's house and next thing you know, the Strinos are glad for the rain because it's stopped IRB getting six tons in the series.

by horace Wed 20 Nov 2013, 21:45

moh - Didn't realise untill I read that Haddin article that he claimed a record number of dismissals for a Test series in the last Ashes. Just imagine how many it would have been if he could catch..-moh

by horace Fri 22 Nov 2013, 04:47

a magical effort from Furri while the Pom 1st innings was experiencing a collapse

Henry wrote:
If this was Pakistan, we'd all be crying foul.

Furri responded
But since this is England we're all sniggering.

by horace Fri 27 Dec 2013, 01:52

gold from Pete

The Diary of Andrew Flower

My New Year's Resolutions for 2014

Sack the cook, cut the carbs, ditch the belly, try to get finn.

Finally drop all the kevin illusions, give up the root, throw away the jonnies and ffs stop ogling brezts.

Cancel all gucci orders.

Above all, make sure you get rid of the piles before the situation gets any worse.

by PeterCS Fri 27 Dec 2013, 02:05

Iron pyrites.

by PeterCS Thu 03 Jul 2014, 11:30

No GOLD for half a year.

Serious shit, man.

by horace Fri 04 Jul 2014, 01:04

disagree....I think much of the pomgolian domestic thread alone is worthy of consideration and shoud have been nominated.... Danny's cool headed assessments of the Pants' performances alone could be used as dialogue in Francois Truffaut retrospective movies

by horace Mon 22 Dec 2014, 23:58

I really liked this from bradman / qm3 / ???

"Well it hurt having to fill up with unleaded and not being able to access the great diesel fuel rip-off that makes up for the great diesel fuel rip-off.

First time in a new car for years. Yikes! Like stepping onto the bridge of the SS Enterprise. Yelling at an eight year old girl to get the manual out of the dash and tell me what all the funny lights popping up on the dash were.

"What's an index Uncle qmy? Isn't there an app for this?"

by horace Wed 03 Jun 2015, 02:11

Lindsay no.2 wrote:
As per some of the earlier posts - the closer to zero hour it gets the clock becomes less of a thing to raise my excitement levels and begins to serve more and more as a reminder of impending destruction. It's like being in a disaster movie with a countdown clock telling us how long there is until the meteor hits the earth. Only in our movie Bruce Willis's role is played by Ian Bell.

gold

by DJ_Smerk Wed 08 Jul 2015, 21:34

Is Horrie still here?

by Big Dog Wed 08 Jul 2015, 22:53

DJ_Smerk wrote:Is Horrie still here?

Yes but i think he's off traveling at the moment.

by PeterCS Thu 09 Jul 2015, 00:27

He may be preparing a dot-heavy paragraph harrumphing about doctored pitches: leavened with a reminder that I Ron is even more certainly FEC after Day 1.

by skully Thu 09 Jul 2015, 01:09

DJ_Smerk wrote:Is Horrie still here?

Big Dog wrote:
DJ_Smerk wrote:Is Horrie still here?

Yes but i think he's off traveling at the moment.

Spoke to the old cock this morning. Just sorting out some personal shit, but loving the cricket and hating Haddit. He'll be back soon.

by furriner Thu 09 Jul 2015, 05:35

JGK wrote:Stats of the Day:

13% - percentage of Joe Root’s career runs scored after being dropped on 0 by Haddin

7 – the contribution to Joe Root’s career average attributable to 2 Haddin dropped catches

48% - percentage of Joe Root’s career runs scored in 10 Ashes tests after being dropped on 0 by Haddin

20.65 – Joe Root’s career Ashes average in 10 Tests if not for Brad Haddin.

by lardbucket Sat 15 Aug 2015, 08:29

horace wrote:Lindsay no.2 wrote:
As per some of the earlier posts - the closer to zero hour it gets the clock becomes less of a thing to raise my excitement levels and begins to serve more and more as a reminder of impending destruction. It's like being in a disaster movie with a countdown clock telling us how long there is until the meteor hits the earth. Only in our movie Bruce Willis's role is played by Ian Bell.

gold

Pyrites ...

by Growler Mon 17 Aug 2015, 13:00

Zat wrote:
Allan D wrote:There is absolutely nothing wrong with good-natured banter but internet forums should not be used to make libellous or scabrous allegations nor are they the place for retarded verbal bullies like you and your partner-in-crime. Noone is forcing you to participarte in this forum or peruse every thread or read every post but if you do use the forum you should extend a measure of courtesy and respect to your fellow members. If you have any problem with the quantity or quality of posts there is a perfectly reasonable procedure to use rather than setting out deliberately to destroy threads by posting garbage.

If you think you can intimidate me into silence and quiescence just as you have intimidated others then I'm afraid you'd better think again. Caving in to a few thugs and bullies with an exaggerated sense of their moral "superiority" is what happened in Germany in 1933 and we all know where that particular road led. My parents didn't go without bananas and oranges for 6 years just so I should truckle to the likes of you. If you want the forum shut down altogether just carry on behaving in the way you are doing. It's your choice. In the meantime if you cannot post any on-topic material I suggest you and your kamerad leave this thread alone and, preferably, set up your own forum for yourselves and the rest of the herrenvolk.
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THREAD

Dello wrote:Heated political debate turns personal as Allan D gets down to the real issues and in no way presents himself as a fruitophilic mentaloid.

From page 1 ........ my pic to prove AD wasn't lying about his folks' lack of fruit consumption.

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