World Cup 2011 (II)

vilkrang wrote:I hope Athers gives them some sh!t here.

As if. Need Nasser up there with the mic.

Sounds petty but I'm taking so much pleasure in the fact that the ground is only half full, really pathetic set of supporters. Almost as pathetic as the England team.

Almost.

Last 4 overs were sheer mental. Sheer mayhem. Englishmen panicking all over and Bangars scoring off their panic bowling more than anything else without even trying too hard. Sheer entertainment!

They were a beaten side from the moment they started batting and realised the pitch wasn't an absolute fill-your-boots belter. Played every ball like a hand grenade. A hand grenade that was also a pedo. And they were little schoolgirls in assless chaps. Bound to a radiator.

And the bowling was shocking. You'd think none of them had ever seen a left-handed batsman before. What a meal they made out of bowling to the southpaws. Incredible. Wides all over the place - when they strayed from their default leg-stump line (to an off-side field).

But in the end, you have to feel happy for the Bangles. They had more bottle than England. More heart. More guts. And more glory.

The Ireland defeat wasn't a shock, so this one is even less so - England have had it coming. They're as atrocious an ODI side as they've always been.

And the next person who uses the term "leader of the pack" in conjunction with James Anderson (similarly, the next person to big up Ian Formofhislifebell) is getting letter-bombed. Or a stern finger-wagging, depending on whether I can get hold of any cheap Semtex or not.

F*ck off home you c*nts. What a shambles this WC has been - from start to finish.

Just out of interest, are yorkers taboo for English bowlers? I haven't seen them bowl one yet at this World Cup.

Brass Monkey wrote:I honestly hope that the Windies beat us. We deserve the ignominy of going out in the group stages. I'm seriously cheering for WI.

Yeah, reminds me of when the football team lost to Croatia, I was pleased as I knew it would get rid of McClaren. Not that Cappello has done much better...

But anyway, yes, as I said earlier I don't think most of this team deserve to have smiles on their faces and if they managed to get to the quarters and then sneak a win there then they could well try to pass it off as a successful tournament but this should be looked at as the worst world cup we've ever had (which it is, we've never lost to 2 minnows, I don't think any team has) and for that to happen we need to lose against the Windies.

Would be funnier if we beat them and still didn't get through (which could happen if the Bangles beat SA) but I think I'm with you Danny, f**k these dross weasels, they don't deserve my support.

Extras was gypped of the man of the match award.

Chivalry Augustus wrote:Just out of interest, are yorkers taboo for English bowlers? I haven't seen them bowl one yet at this World Cup.

Timbo bowled a couple against India. Went well, IIRC. Stumps out of the ground, that kind of thing. Probably why England abandoned that tactic straight after - all those high-fives and back-slaps are a bit of a f*cking hassle.

Chivalry Augustus wrote:Just out of interest, are yorkers taboo for English bowlers? I haven't seen them bowl one yet at this World Cup.

I was wondering why Jimmy wasn't bowling the yorkers or more to middle stump. He got through just 1 I think. One attempt landed short and ended up crossing the boundary ropes. It's baffling the guy has not worked on this aspect of finishing the death overs after so much one day experience. Come to think of it that art looks so lost these days. Even Indian bowlers struggle a lot trying to bowl in the blockhole at death overs.

But what's the point of wanting them to lose? They were humiliated at the last World Cup. So they dropped some bits and pieces cricketers and brought some new ones in. Then they replaced some players who couldn't play ODIs (like Vaughan) with more players who couldn't play ODIs (like Bell). England losing embarrassingly for the umpteenth time doesn't seem likely to change the selection policy. England are crap because they pick bad ODI cricketers. And they will continue to be bad because they seem to think this is a good idea. They also seem to think that bowling short is a better tactic than bowling full in ODIs. They also seem to think that bowling badly first time around shall translate to bowling well second time around. Strauss ... well, I think he spends his time in the field thinking about naked ladies and just tries to arrange the fielders into geometric shapes that are suitably arousing. It's all I can think of to explain his sh*teness as a captain.

Dello wrote:
But in the end, you have to feel happy for the Bangles. They had more bottle than England. More heart. More guts. And more glory.

Indeed, would have been a travesty if England had scraped those last two wickets, they deserved nothing from that game.

Dello wrote:
And the next person who uses the term "leader of the pack" in conjunction with James Anderson (similarly, the next person to big up Ian Formofhislifebell) is getting letter-bombed.

To be fair, Bell has been decent in tests for a while now. I hope this tournament hasn't scarred him though, I don't care what anyone says about the different formats, there is no way this tournament won't have an effect on the test team.

Batman wrote:

Chivalry Augustus wrote:Just out of interest, are yorkers taboo for English bowlers? I haven't seen them bowl one yet at this World Cup.

I was wondering why Jimmy wasn't bowling the yorkers or more to middle stump. He got through just 1 I think. One attempt landed short and ended up crossing the boundary ropes. It's baffling the guy has not worked on this aspect of finishing the death overs after so much one day experience. Come to think of it that art looks so lost these days. Even Indian bowlers struggle a lot trying to bowl in the blockhole at death overs.

It's not a mystery. Justin Langer had his number - he's a massive pussy who falls to pieces under pressure.

He didn't bowl any yorkers today because his earlier attempts in the competition - under pressure - were beamers. Which probably didn't do his fickle confidence much good.

Chivalry Augustus wrote:But what's the point of wanting them to lose? They were humiliated at the last World Cup. So they dropped some bits and pieces cricketers and brought some new ones in. Then they replaced some players who couldn't play ODIs (like Vaughan) with more players who couldn't play ODIs (like Bell). England losing embarrassingly for the umpteenth time doesn't seem likely to change the selection policy. England are crap because they pick bad ODI cricketers. And they will continue to be bad because they seem to think this is a good idea. They also seem to think that bowling short is a better tactic than bowling full in ODIs. They also seem to think that bowling badly first time around shall translate to bowling well second time around. Strauss ... well, I think he spends his time in the field thinking about naked ladies and just tries to arrange the fielders into geometric shapes that are suitably arousing. It's all I can think of to explain his sh*teness as a captain.

It might not change anything, but scraping through to the quarters would change even less. As I suggested before, perhaps we should be the first nation to effectively retire the 50-over format and just use it to try out youngsters who might feature in the other two.

Hope the West Indies absolutely stuff us, although it would be kind of funny if we scraped through then beat the Aussies in the quarter-finals...

beamer wrote:

Chivalry Augustus wrote:But what's the point of wanting them to lose? They were humiliated at the last World Cup. So they dropped some bits and pieces cricketers and brought some new ones in. Then they replaced some players who couldn't play ODIs (like Vaughan) with more players who couldn't play ODIs (like Bell). England losing embarrassingly for the umpteenth time doesn't seem likely to change the selection policy. England are crap because they pick bad ODI cricketers. And they will continue to be bad because they seem to think this is a good idea. They also seem to think that bowling short is a better tactic than bowling full in ODIs. They also seem to think that bowling badly first time around shall translate to bowling well second time around. Strauss ... well, I think he spends his time in the field thinking about naked ladies and just tries to arrange the fielders into geometric shapes that are suitably arousing. It's all I can think of to explain his sh*teness as a captain.

It might not change anything, but scraping through to the quarters would change even less. As I suggested before, perhaps we should be the first nation to effectively retire the 50-over format and just use it to try out youngsters who might feature in the other two.

Hope the West Indies absolutely stuff us, although it would be kind of funny if we scraped through then beat the Aussies in the quarter-finals...

If we used it to try out youngsters, we'd instantly be a much better team. We'd probably be able to field and the players would have something to prove. And it's not as if the likes of James Taylor, James Hildreth, Alex Hales, Chris Woakes, Adil Rashid, Danny Briggs, Steven Finn, Jos Buttler, are any worse one-day cricketers than the current mob. In fact, I'd throw all those players into this team right now, happily.

Ah well, this has been a splendid end to a fairly awful day for me. Thanks England, thanks Bangladesh.

So on form you'd think that England will come away from this dealie with two wins, against Netherlands and RSA. Jaapies should be embarrassed.

Dello wrote:

Batman wrote:

Chivalry Augustus wrote:Just out of interest, are yorkers taboo for English bowlers? I haven't seen them bowl one yet at this World Cup.

I was wondering why Jimmy wasn't bowling the yorkers or more to middle stump. He got through just 1 I think. One attempt landed short and ended up crossing the boundary ropes. It's baffling the guy has not worked on this aspect of finishing the death overs after so much one day experience. Come to think of it that art looks so lost these days. Even Indian bowlers struggle a lot trying to bowl in the blockhole at death overs.

It's not a mystery. Justin Langer had his number - he's a massive pussy who falls to pieces under pressure.

He didn't bowl any yorkers today because his earlier attempts in the competition - under pressure - were beamers. Which probably didn't do his fickle confidence much good.

In light of the ashes that's a tad unfair. In test cricket he's fine- Pressure or not. It's just ODI cricket where he is complete and utter filth.

Nasser was spot on with Anderson- He gets affected by the crowds in the Sub Continent. Hears them roaring as a few boundaries are hit, tries to run in harder, loses his bearings, and gets all dizzy and puzzle faced.

And along with the lack of yorkers, how about the lack of slower balls? I can remember perhaps one or two bowled. No variation at all.

And the less said about Strauss's ODI captaincy, the better.

For me, the only players who can hold their heads high in the World Cup are Bresnan, Trott, Broad (now injured), and Swann. Strauss has done ok with the bat but has been a disaster as captain.

Strauss, Prior, Anderson, Pietersen, Yardy, and Bell should be nowhere near an England ODI side again.

Just got in from a day out, Bwahahahaaa... I knew it.

Not seen anything other than the scorecard but 2 things stand out:

1. Bell 5 off 23 balls

2. 23 wides

Mark my words, England will qualify in 4th, beat Aus in the QF and go on to win the World Cup.

I've seen some slating of Trott recently, which I don't really understand. Basically he's been the backbone of any sort of totals we've put together & others have failed before him. Notably the bowling.

Oh, I see we had them 8 down with 50 to get - did Strauss put a slip in?

vilkrang wrote:The last two wicket taking deliveries from Shahzad have been incredible.

He can only bowl to right-handers.

vilkrang wrote:

Henry wrote:Matt Prior has been awful in this World Cup.

Utterly shocking, makes a mockery of the decision to recall him.

Aye. He's another one to be lined up against the ODI wall when this debacle is finally over.

Get the Bedwetter back.

Dello wrote:

vilkrang wrote:The last two wicket taking deliveries from Shahzad have been incredible.

He can only bowl to right-handers.

Better than Anderson, who at the moment can only bowl to retarded children. As long as they are out of form. And legally blind.

fark, that was funny.

Just shows how crap SA are.

taipan wrote:fark, that was funny.

Just shows how crap SA are.

Though we still have to lose - at least in this WC - to the Bangers and Irish...

JKLever wrote:

1. Bell 5 off 23 balls

During the second power play. As England amassed an astonishing 10. Ten. One-zero. Ten.

I've seen some slating of Trott recently, which I don't really understand. Basically he's been the backbone of any sort of totals we've put together & others have failed before him.

Puts runs on the board. At his own pace. Doesn't have any other change of gear. Can't force shots. Basically, his runs are valuable, but he's a bit of a liability if he's still out there clogging up the joint in power-play overs. Or if you've had a slow start and need to step on the gas a little to catch up.

He just can't not plod along.

mynah wrote:

taipan wrote:fark, that was funny.

Just shows how crap SA are.

Though we still have to lose - at least in this WC - to the Bangers and Irish...

But we lost to England