England v New Zealand, 2nd ODI, Ageas Bowl, 2 June, 2013

1 down, 2 to go.

Weather set fair down here, I believe.

Should be a good game. For NZ.

England will try and negative their way to another fun sucking victory, but their combination of piemen and sloths won't cut it in these parts.

I predict further mediocrity, laced with some smarmy arrogance and an incredible lack of self-awareness.

But all within a lovely setting.

A bit like Auschwitz

What's an Ageas Bowl? Leg spin?

Quick recap on the S/Rs -

66.66, 69.23, 69.81, 75, 66.66, 56, 67.92

Jeez, as Dello says, that's 1970's.

Obviously an assumption based on the Test that anything over 200 would be enough on that pitch. The conditions, and bowling attack we had to defend it, made sure that didn't stack up.

With this team we will win matches on 200 or 220 pitches, which will win plenty of series in English conditions. Post a steady total and then Jimmy takes out the top order in swinging conditions, or bowl the opposition out cheaply with little pressure on the batsmen to score quickly in a chase. We certainly won't win games on 300 pitches though, and will usually lose them heavily.

Also I think in one-day cricket they have a duty to entertain. Without the subtleties and twists and turns of Test cricket, limited overs needs explosive action. People won't pay £60 a time to see Trott blocking out maidens and Bell playing his classy drives for no run.

Nice stylistic point: the way beamer goes from 'we' to 'they' in his final paragraph.

A marker of alienation!

Well, "we" means England as a cricketing nation, team and supporters. Whereas the last paragraph can clearly only refer to the players themselves, the supporters can't provide the entertainment, unless you count streakers, beer snakes and Mexican waves!

Every time I see, or hear of, England playing an ODI I get so excited I could wank all day long. And half the night if it's a day-night game.

There's millions of us out there. Join us.

Why? Are you falling apart?

beamer wrote:
Also I think in one-day cricket they have a duty to entertain. Without the subtleties and twists and turns of Test cricket, limited overs needs explosive action. People won't pay £60 a time to see Trott blocking out maidens and Bell playing his classy drives for no run.

You're telling me. It's surely another nail in the coffin of ODIs, seeing England rock up to block the shit out of the first 30 overs before having a brief dart towards the end of the innings, which appears to be their entire plan.

They could've scored 227 a/o in 25 overs yesterday - at least the ride would've been quite enjoyable.

Instead they just drag out the grim narrative to it's tediously predictable conclusion.

They're monsters. Won't someone think of the children? Not in a Jimmy Savile way - watching England, they've been through enough.

it's tediously predictable?

England - drumming up support for Test cricket in one-day venues everywhere.

I do like the Ageas Bowl.


Sounds like classical constipation gone wrong.

Because the only way to play ODIs in England is to block for 30 overs and then desperately try and accelerate at the end to get to 260-270...

Sri Lanka 333/3 (6.66 rpo) lost to India 337/5 (6.8 rpo) in Birmingham today.

See? Sri Lanka try an unEnglish tactic, and where does it get them?

Dello wrote:Because the only way to play ODIs in England is to block for 30 overs and then desperately try and accelerate at the end to get to 260-270...

Sri Lanka 333/3 (6.66 rpo) lost to India 337/5 (6.8 rpo) in Birmingham today.

Didn't even watch the second half, assumed a demoralised India would fold to around 100 short!

These warm-ups are not even JAMODIs though, allowing teams to use more than 11 players, it really is a waste of time. Imagine scoring a century in one of these and it counts for fark all in terms of career records. Either have proper "official" games or stay in the nets.

Oh wait, what's that? Australia scored at 6.66 per over, easily chasing down the Windies 260 with 11 overs to spare?

Batting in England? (Wales, actually...)

Can't be done. Cannot be done.

Jolly bad form. Deport the cads, I say.

"Everything's ok" - I'm paraphrasing Cricket Writers On TV.

Wow. I feel better now.

"Compton must find his A-game ahead of Ashes... otherwise Bell could step in to open"


Riiigghhhhttt.

"Bell has been getting out softly again and just might be in need of a new challenge at 31."


Rrrriiiiigggghhhhtttttio.

Paul Newman: genius.

Bell just needs a kick up the backside every three years, it seems (ie, getting dropped)