England v New Zealand, 2nd ODI, Ageas Bowl, 2 June, 2013

England unchanged. Hoof*ckingray.

We're as brainwashed as the BCCI

Brass Monkey wrote:"Bell has been getting out softly again and just might be in need of a new challenge at 31."

That's his average.

I thought you were going to say his IQ

Henry wrote:England unchanged. Hoof*ckingray.

To be fair, who can they bring in? Ravi Bopara? That Irish bloke? Not him, the other one. Johnny B?

Actually, the batting is a man light (Buttler at six? That's about his top score) and Woakes is a worse bowler than Ravi, whose dobby medium pacers at least shape a bit in to the right handers, so he should play really at the expense of the Warwickshire cripple who even Simon "big up" Hughes concedes is never going to be international class.

Anyway, NZ having a bat and resting Southee to make a series of it. They're bloody nice, New Zealanders.

Bresnan gets the new ball this time... starts with a wide. Can Luke Wonky improve on his debut effort?

Bit of a peach by Jandy.

Rankin must have bowled some absolute filth in the nets to not get a game ahead of Dernbach.

Dello wrote:

Henry wrote:England unchanged. Hoof*ckingray.

To be fair, who can they bring in? Ravi Bopara? That Irish bloke? Not him, the other one. Johnny B?

Actually, the batting is a man light (Buttler at six? That's about his top score) and Woakes is a worse bowler than Ravi, whose dobby medium pacers at least shape a bit in to the right handers, so he should play really at the expense of the Warwickshire cripple who even Simon "big up" Hughes concedes is never going to be international class.

Moan, moan, moan. You've turned into General Moan.

Look, it's a lovely day, right?

Better than being unrealistic.

300 par here. England are f*cked.

Brass Monkey wrote:Better than being unrealistic.

Why? Can't we just pass round the drugs and bellow and guffaw our way through the day, Brian Blessed style?

Cautious start from the Snoozers, but they can really tee off when our TAYPOC bowlers come on in the middle overs. Just wish Swann could bowl 20!

I suppose we may as well get some overs out of Bresnan early in case he gets a call from home, maybe that's their thinking as otherwise we might end up with Root having to bowl 7 or 8 overs.

Since when the f*ck did we start using the Kookaburra ball in OdIs in England?

Guptill smacks a Woakes long-hop straight to Trott at mid-wicket... who drops it.

PeterCS wrote:

Brass Monkey wrote:Better than being unrealistic.

Why? Can't we just pass round the drugs and bellow and guffaw our way through the day, Brian Blessed style?

He's just telling it how it is - sort of anti-England.

I don't see why he shouldn't be allowed.

I mean, Trott just did a shit drop - am I supposed to say well done for getting two hands on it?

It's Dirtbag time... first three deliveries, 3, 2, wide. Economy rate 18.0.

beamer wrote:It's Dirtbag time... first three deliveries, 3, 2, wide. Economy rate 18.0.

OR you can look at it that he's being kind to NZ and we should applaud his generous spirit.

Good man. THAT'S THE SPIRIT. Now, let's have that quarter.

Henry wrote:Since when the f*ck did we start using the Kookaburra ball in OdIs in England?

Do Duke do a white ball?

I thought we'd used Kookaburras for years.

Speak for yourself.

Corblimey this Woakes chap is a free and easy type.

And this Dernbach fellow, he keeps you interested. And have you seen his chest hair? Hawww.