Re: Australia v England, 3rd ODI, Sydney, 19 January, 2014

by Basil Sat 18 Jan 2014, 10:38

Gary 111 wrote:
Dello wrote:Rankin - gone. Has to be. Can't finish a game. What the actual f*ck?
Bresnan - gone. Has to be. He's just nothing.
Root - gone. Batting's at Finn Factor Five. Missed that delivery from Johnson - that wasn't especially fast - by miles. And then wasted the team's review again. His neat spin bowling isn't enough. They might as well pick a front line spinner.

Do we even have a front line spinner? Aside from Monty i'm not sure one exists in England and for some reason after a couple of average games he's persona non grata (whilst 10 shit games and you'll still get picked).

There's Briggs - if you can call someone a spinner who actually doesn't turn it and fires the ball in at leg stump. Tredwell? - picking him would be good for the slaphead count, but that's about all.

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 10:42

Basil wrote:
Gary 111 wrote:
Dello wrote:Rankin - gone. Has to be. Can't finish a game. What the actual f*ck?
Bresnan - gone. Has to be. He's just nothing.
Root - gone. Batting's at Finn Factor Five. Missed that delivery from Johnson - that wasn't especially fast - by miles. And then wasted the team's review again. His neat spin bowling isn't enough. They might as well pick a front line spinner.

Do we even have a front line spinner? Aside from Monty i'm not sure one exists in England and for some reason after a couple of average games he's persona non grata (whilst 10 shit games and you'll still get picked).

There's Briggs - if you can call someone a spinner who actually doesn't turn it and fires the ball in at leg stump. Tredwell? - picking him would be good for the slaphead count, but that's about all.

Does this have a different meaning in the UK than it does in Aus??

by Gary 111 Sat 18 Jan 2014, 10:50

That would depend on what it means in Australia.

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:05

It means "Asian" in some quarters.

by beamer Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:09

Just a mildly derogatory term for a bald person over here...

by G.Wood Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:10

Surely Carbs has to get a go. Or does Giles share Trev's opinion of black people?

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:12

beamer wrote:Just a mildly derogatory term for a bald person over here...

Well I've learned sumpent today. Cheers beams.

by JGK Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:13

What do you call a bald Asian then?

by JGK Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:14

G.Wood wrote:Surely Carbs has to get a go. Or does Giles share Trev's opinion of black people?

Aye. I think only on Planet Gilo is Root a better JAMODI selection that Carbs.

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:15

JGK wrote:What do you call a bald Asian then?

In the UK, or Aus? Cool

Personally, I'd go with "Guvner".

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:16

JGK wrote:
G.Wood wrote:Surely Carbs has to get a go. Or does Giles share Trev's opinion of black people?

Aye. I think only on Planet Gilo is Root a better JAMODI selection that Carbs.

Spain?

by Gary 111 Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:25

JGK wrote:What do you call a bald Asian then?

I was going to post the name of a famous bald Asian as a glib comment, but I couldn't think if one. So I googled images of 'famous bald Asian' and the first images to come up were:

Charles Barclay
Natalie Portman
a dirt track
the back of a scrawny monk
Patrick Stewart
Prince William
Vin Diesel
Prince William
Robert Pattinson
Bruce Willis
Some woman I don't recognise with short hair
The ginger one from sex and the city
Natalie Portman (again)
Amber Rose
General Ambrose Burnside
Jason Statham
Zinedine Zidane
Cameron Diaz
the back of a T-shirt
A scrawny monk
Two bald eagles
Jennifer Aniston giving a head massage
A woman on a phone with an Apple tattoo on the side of her head
A cat
An old Daniel Craig
The top of someones head
Nicole Kidman
James Nesbitt

Virtually none of them are Asian, most of them aren't even bald. Maybe they don't exist?

by JGK Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:27

Boof wrote:The BC

by Gary 111 Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:29

JGK wrote:
G.Wood wrote:Surely Carbs has to get a go. Or does Giles share Trev's opinion of black people?

Aye. I think only on Planet Gilo is Root a better JAMODI selection that Carbs.

He is actually, although he's horribly out of form.

Has done a very solid job at 5, decent S/R and average until this tour and can bowl a bit. Carbs should be in there as well, either opening or at 3. Although he's done very little in his handful of ODI's to date.

by beamer Sat 18 Jan 2014, 11:37

Sanath Jayasuriya? Quite bald, and quite Asian... though I suppose Sri Lanka is an island as opposed to part of mainland Asia...

by G.Wood Sat 18 Jan 2014, 13:19

Gary 111 wrote:
JGK wrote:
G.Wood wrote:Surely Carbs has to get a go. Or does Giles share Trev's opinion of black people?

Aye. I think only on Planet Gilo is Root a better JAMODI selection that Carbs.

He is actually, although he's horribly out of form.

Has done a very solid job at 5, decent S/R and average until this tour and can bowl a bit. Carbs should be in there as well, either opening or at 3. Although he's done very little in his handful of ODI's to date.

I was actually thinking Cook could be the one to make way. That may have the added bonus of Bopara getting more overs and Bresnan less.

by Basil Sat 18 Jan 2014, 19:28

Right then, Broad comes in for Bresnan. Root probably keeps his place only because he can bowl a few overs of off spin. Briggs to come in for Rankin then.

I'm trying to be optimistic - but Deckchairs, Titanic etc, etc.

by Nath Sat 18 Jan 2014, 21:21

is Giles returning as playing capt/coach?

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 22:53

SF added to the squad as cover for Beetle and his groin.

by JGK Sat 18 Jan 2014, 23:10

Hmm... I wonder if the Saffie tour selectors are thanking Allah for Bailey's groin so they can avoid a tough decision.

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 23:15

Aye, perfect chance to slip Twat to 6 and bring in a young technically sound no. 3. Bit of a baptism of fire v SAf but.

by JGK Sat 18 Jan 2014, 23:22

Do we have a technically sound No 3? Burns or Doolan I guess.

Was thinking more about playing YT at 6.

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 23:34

Meh, YT is a less talented version of Twatto.

I'd be giving Doolan a go, although I would understand the NSP's reluctance to give him such a tough ask first up. Burns is injured, no?

by JGK Sat 18 Jan 2014, 23:44

YT ain't gonna be worse than Bailey plus he anywhere close to the bat plus he adds the same "experience" that Bailey does.

Plus he was in a bit of form before the BBL.

by skully Sat 18 Jan 2014, 23:56

Furry muff. I guess a hard head with experience is probably the ticket for the Yarp battle.

We are so screwed.

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