Glossary update 2015

I was sure it originated with Jon (he’s given as the primary example in the original glossary) then was subsequently/retrospectively applied to other crap Lewises… still, as we’re probably going back to C4 at least it’s impossible to prove in any way!

Anyway, Hamilton boycotted the F1 end of season gala. Lewis FFS.

I defer to your better memory, beams.

Long live the Lewises FFS.

skully wrote:

PeterCS wrote:Comment on his captaincy, not his batting.

When batting, he's "Trunk".

Trunk main? Tree "trunk"? Elephant proboscis?

The main stem of the England batting, such as it is. (Play on "Root")

skully wrote:

PeterCS wrote:"Pisa" is England opening bat Rory Burns.

Pisa crap? Leaning Tower of?

The former. His stance awaiting the ball, which I desribed as "less trigger movement, more toppling shooting gallery".

But in the simpler sense, he leans forward, off balance. Yes, he is slightly more orthodox as he addresses the ball, but with that and the sideways topple being adjusted too, it's too late. His head is not still, and rarely (accurately) over the ball.

I mean, if he scored regular 40s, 50s and above, it wouldn't matter.

Someone once said on here "technique is overrated" (taipan) ... an overstatement, which I would apply only to aesthetic qualities, esp with regard to distribution of weight and beauty of stroke. If your head and feet are more often than not found (out) in the wrong place, down the wrong line, and also not balanced, you are asking for trouble every time. Hence, I'd say *technique* is often UNDERrated at the moment. You've got to have a decent amount of it, to give your hand-eye coordination and timing of the bat a regular chance.

I still think Dello's suggestion of a year or two ago of "Labia" (or in full, Labia-Shane) for Marnus might be the best.

Short and snappy. And more obvious than the tortuous "Shrapnel", for example.


You do all know these are just stray thoughts, not proposals, I hope ...

Given 'Labia' has the same back-seat-of-the-school-bus smirk factor as 'Blow' for Head, it's amazing it wasn't picked up universally oln day 1

PeterCS wrote:

skully wrote:

PeterCS wrote:"Pisa" is England opening bat Rory Burns.

Pisa crap? Leaning Tower of?

The former. His stance awaiting the ball, which I desribed as "less trigger movement, more toppling shooting gallery".

But in the simpler sense, he leans forward, off balance. Yes, he is slightly more orthodox as he addresses the ball, but with that and the sideways topple being adjusted too, it's too late. His head is not still, and rarely (accurately) over the ball.

I mean, if he scored regular 40s, 50s and above, it wouldn't matter.

Someone once said on here "technique is overrated" (taipan) ... an overstatement, which I would apply only to aesthetic qualities, esp with regard to distribution of weight and beauty of stroke. If your head and feet are more often than not found (out) in the wrong place, down the wrong line, and also not balanced, you are asking for trouble every time. Hence, I'd say *technique* is often UNDERrated at the moment. You've got to have a decent amount of it, to give your hand-eye coordination and timing of the bat a regular chance.

A lot of unorthodox techniques have had great success in Test cricket, from the explosiveness of KP to the crabby Chanderpaul to the pair of Smiths that have given England bowlers nightmares over the past 20 years.

Effectiveness beats coaching manual, otherwise Bell, Vince and Pope would be Bradmans (Bradmen?) Burns was the only opener making a case for selection in county cricket for years, made thousands of runs, obviously Test cricket is a different matter but he has been the least bad opener we’ve had since Cook (tallest dwarf contest, I know). Maybe 30 is a good average for an opener playing half his games in England these days, who knows, or maybe a non-specialist would do no worse. Either way we’re no closer to finding a clear way forward. My guess is we’ll see Bairstow as an unsuccessful stopgap and then Sibley back in the fray next summer…

skully wrote:My memory may be shot too, W, but I seem to recall that Lewis FFS originated after Mick Lewis's ignominious effort in THAT ODI in ABC forum days. Sort of an outlet to we Aussies' anger at losing the unlosable, i.e. it was all Mick Lewis's fault FFS.

Rawl and Chris merely fitted into the persona over time.

No, it was Jon first. Probably Dello.

Cheers Mr bucket. Beams was on point.

To quote the original glossary…

Lewis FFS (n) Jon, Mick, Tony, or Rawl (most commonly Jon). All players who have strutted the international stage representing entities larger than the Isle of Lewis, which they might have struggled to be chosen for.

Jon Lewis FFS only ever played one Test, which surprises me (not because he deserved to play any more, but because he seemed to be in the frame for quite a while, I think he was named in the squad quite a number of times which prompted Dello or whoever’s FFS response…)

Bump.

I can't believe TPOS (Toxic Piece of Shit) has not made it into the Glossary.

Very topical of late, given Clarke's unedifying public display through the week.

skully wrote:Bump.

I can't believe TPOS (Toxic Piece of Shit) has not made it into the Glossary.

I can. The (very part time) glossary editor is a lazy shit.

I'm sure we are all grateful for any effort (however minuscule ) you put in with the Glossary.

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